KEY POINTS:
I'd love not to mention the smog any more as the constant blather about it gets on your nerves a bit.
No, let me re-phrase that. It gets in your eyes and your throat. It doesn't make you cough or splutter or wheeze or anything like that, it's just an irritant - although it makes you wonder what damage you are doing to yourself.
Here's another irritant - the constant PR battle over the smog. On the one hand is the International Olympic Committee, saying the smog isn't smog or falls within acceptable limits - take your pick.
On the other hand, the media and some athletes... oh, that's right... and common sense.
The last entry into the smog battle was the US cycling team who arrived wearing black anti-smog masks that made them look like members of Jesse James' gang. A bit over the top? Uh-huh. Specially as some of them wore the masks on the plane. I mean, really...
They also seemed surprised that anyone in Beijing might take offence at them wearing masks (so the unthinking ugly American abroad isn't quite dead then) in the airport - which is fully air-conditioned and which therefore strains the air at least a little.
Beijingers seem to have shrugged off this unintentional slight. They regarded the cyclists with some amusement and a touch of resignation, as if to say: 'Crazy Americans.'
But the cyclists - already many hope the US cycling team misses out on medals - touched off another round of the smog/not smog debate. On Wednesday, the IOC issued a statement by Arne Ljungqvist, the chairman of the IOC's medical commission which said: "Air quality at Games time will be adequate for Olympic sports events."
This is the same fella who said earlier that haze does not mean poor quality air and who went on to say: "We are using World Health Organization (WHO) standards for evaluation ... They are fairly tough to meet, but in many aspects, Beijing does."
"The mist in the air that we see in those places, including here, is not a feature of pollution primarily but a feature of evaporation and humidity," Ljungqvist said. "I'm sure, I'm confident the air quality will not prove to pose major problems to the athletes and to the visitors in Beijing."
Enough already. The BBC and Associate Press, unhappy at the rather, shall we say, pleasant spin being put on matters skyward, have been doing their own independent testing and have found that the smog is highly dependent on meteorological conditions rather than any of the measures the Chinese government has taken.
One boast that the particulate matter in Beijing's air was lower than that of New York on one day this week did not mention that a cloudburst had cleared the air just before measuring took place. It also didn't mention that on another day, particulate measurement was eight times that considered healthy.
There are unconfirmed reports that there are larger numbers of athletes than normal deciding not to march in the opening ceremony tomorrow night because of the air - or at least using it as an excuse to rest up for their events.
So enough already. Your intrepid correspondent is relying on his own eyes - and throat. I am looking out my window in the media village. The tall buildings that I can normally see have disappeared in a grey soup. No-one will be leaping over them in a single bound.
I go for a walk in it. Within 10 minutes, I feel some prickling of eyes and in my throat. Am I getting sick? No. Could I run in this stuff? Yes, but it wouldn't be much fun.
But mist? Mist? Who are the IOC trying to kid?
If this is a mist then, as they say in the USA, my ass is a pineapple.
Paul Lewis
Pictured above: A bicyclist rides past Tiananmen Square at sunset.. AP Photo / Robert F. Bukaty
