KEY POINTS:
Talk to working parents and, repeatedly, the most important aspect of their return to work is deciding on childcare.
Some parents stagger working hours so that they are the dominant carers and a grandparent or other family members fill in the gaps. But most working parents have to look outside their families for childcare.
The childcare decision is never easy. First, parents have to choose whether to place their child into care. Then they have to work through the process of choosing which type of care best suits their needs.
Galia BarHava-Monteith who, with Sarah Wilshaw-Sparkes, runs Professionelle, a website for working women in New Zealand, says the most difficult thing about returning to work is leaving your child with strangers. "The transition back to work is that much harder if you don't have total peace of mind about the wellbeing of your child."
She suggests asking yourself:
* How much can you afford to pay?
* How flexible does the care need to be? (sickness; travel out of town; sudden client deadlines?)
* Considering the answers, what seems the most preferable arrangement? Day care, in-home care with other children, nanny?
Take time to make your decision. Ask friends, family and workmates for referrals. Consider the price of childcare. As a rough guide, Barnardos' hourly rate starts from $4.50, daytime nannies in Auckland cost around $15-$20 an hour, while daycare costs range between centres and suburbs. For example, fulltime care for a six-month-old ranges from around $190 per week at a Manurewa centre and $261 per week at a centre in Ponsonby .
Barbs Tozer, Communications Adviser for Kindercare Learning Centres, says many daycares have substantial waiting lists. "It is advisable to start making enquiries and looking at options available to you well in advance of your return to work.
"This takes the pressure off you to make a rushed decision and also gives parents the flexibility to choose a centre they want their child at, rather than having to settle for what's available at short notice. We have many babies on our waiting lists before they are born, so that parents are assured of a place for them."
The next step is arranging visits to childcare providers in your area. Use the yellow pages or visit www.nzchildcare.co.nz to find centres; and check the Education Review Office website for centre reports.
Notice whether the centres have a low adult-to-children ratio especially in care for children under two. Other aspects to look for are how the staff interact with the children; and the centre's physical environment. Are staff friendly, encouraging and attentive? Do the children look happy?
Dannette Harding started the website www.nzchildcare.co.nz in 2001 when she saw a need for more information about childcare on the internet.
She says parents know their children best. "Consider your child's activity level, need for social interaction, tolerance to new routines - to select a child care setting that's right for him/her.
"Is your child adaptable or cautious and hesitant when faced with a new situation? Would he or she be more relaxed in a large group of children or a smaller group setting which might be less overwhelming?
Sleep requirements need to be considered. "Some children's sleep-wake patterns adapt easily to a group schedule, while others' do not," says Harding.
If your child has special needs, these need to be discussed, too.
Tozer says her organisation believes the biggest thing for mums/dads returning to the workforce is support and encouragement through those initial weeks when they are getting into a new routine, dealing with separation from their little one and finding how they can best achieve work/life balance.
Daycares encourage parents to take children in for visits before they return to work. After a few visits, try leaving your child at the centre without you. This shows the child that you will return to pick them up, encouraging a healthy separation from you.
And Tozer says parents have to work out if they want a centre close to home or close to work.
"If you choose a place close to home, it means that the child possibly will have less time commuting and if you are not going into work for some reason, but still want your child to attend the early childhood centre for the day, you don't have to travel long distances to make this happen.
"If you choose a place close to where you work, you have time to spend with your little one during the journey. If you wish to continue feeding your baby, then close to work is the logical choice as you can pop out during your lunch hour without having to travel far."
Another option is home-based care. This works well for people working outside the 9 to 5 norm, and for bigger families. If you choose home-based care, using sources outside of family, options include nannies or organisations like Barnardos.
Marie Reilly, customer service facilitator for KidStart Barnados, says the service's trained caregivers offer care to a maximum of four children. Care takes place in the caregiver's homes with support from visiting teachers who hold a diploma in Early Childhood Education.
"The Visiting Teacher makes the first introduction between the family and the caregiver, then we encourage the family to visit a few more times before care starts.
The bonus with nannies is that they cover situations like sick children and parents' extended work hours. And it is an economical option when there is more than one child to be cared for or where after-school care is needed.
Some parents say "that it's wonderful to be able to leave a child settled at home in the morning, with the nanny, to have their breakfast and have the child's day started at the child's pace, rather than having to hurry the child out of the door after a rushed breakfast etc," says Jenny Walker, chairperson for Nanny Education Organisation of New Zealand (NEONZ).
Galia BarHava-Monteith says nannies are the most expensive option. "However, if you're on a high income and you're planning on having another child relatively soon, a nanny might also become cost-effective.
"It is important that you are clear with your nanny about your expectations. Explore how flexible she will be with hours and what her attitude is to non baby related housework. Remember, this is an employment relationship and you want to make sure you are a good employer with a clear contract."
There are a a number of nanny agencies throughout the country. They interview the nannies, do police checks for them and obtain references.
Also, BarHava-Monteith says, "Increasingly, I'm aware of many working women who are able to combine a nanny with centre-based care. This arrangement has the benefit of added flexibility with reduced costs and ensures your child receives the socialisation they need as well."
Making the right childcare choice takes time, but it is worth the effort.
"The most important thing is that you go with your gut instinct," says BarHava-Monteith "Although it isn't advised to chop and change care arrangements for children, you should be sure in your heart that you have a happy child. If they're unsettled for extended periods of time, something isn't quite right and you should look into it."
Childcare
There are many things to consider when making your choice. The Ministry of Education's booklet "choices" is available on line or by phoning the ministry; and has plenty of suggestions to consider when choosing childcare:
* Watch how children and carers interact
* Is the centre clean, pleasant and colourful. Is heating and lighting sufficient?
* Are there separate areas for dry and wet play, and a selection of activities applicable to the children's age?
* Is there a good selection of toys, and what condition are they in?
* What are the toilets/changing facilities like?
* Is there a designated time and area for sleeping?
* Ask what the procedure is if staff notice a child is unwell.
Hiring a nanny
If you're considering hiring a nanny, there are key points to remember.
Galia BarHava-Monteith says:
"Remember that this person will become a part of your household and you need to feel comfortable having her in your house." Make reference checks with past employers, and ask potential nannies to visit so that you can see how well they interact with your children.
Consider asking the nanny to keep a daily diary. "Not only can this give you valuable insights into your baby's play activities and patterns of eating and sleeping etc, it can also make a great repository of milestones," says BarHava-Monteith.
Parents should be aware that children will form attachments with their caregiver. Rather than resenting or envying this closeness, regard it as a peace of mind to know that if your child is sad or gets hurt they will have someone they can go to for comfort and a hug. Jenny Walker, chairperson for NEONZ says "No one can replace the parent and a competent nanny should be adept at keeping communication lines open between parents and herself. This can be done by keeping nanny/parent/child daybooks or portfolios of what happens during the day and including parent notes, photos, as well as nanny and child daily updates in these books.
"Yes, children do become fond of the nanny - but this also can continue to be a plus, even if the nanny leaves. At least the children have learnt what it is like to trust another adult."
