Taryn has had nausea non-stop while Kat has been constantly starving. Photo / Supplied
Taryn has had nausea non-stop while Kat has been constantly starving. Photo / Supplied
A gay couple are on their pregnancy journey together after both conceiving just weeks apart.
Kat Buchanan and Taryn Cumming have been together nearly two years and decided they wanted kids - but planned to have one at a time.
Fertility tests showed they were both short on eggs, and their hormone levels were low, so they had to start quickly, with their doctor telling them it could take six- to 12 months to get pregnant.
With a two-year waiting list for sperm donors at their fertility clinic, the Auckland pair chose instead to go via a Facebook page for sperm and egg donors.
"With our low fertility we had no time to waste," Cumming said. While the process was "hit and miss" - some donors only wanted to use natural insemination, for example - they found someone they liked.
Before meeting him in December they agreed that they would squeeze each others' legs under the table if they approved. "Within 10 minutes we were both squeezing each others' legs - he was so perfect."
After Cumming's first artificial insemination attempt didn't take, two weeks later Buchanan had a turn.
Then two weeks later Cumming tried again. "We found out Kat was pregnant and a week later to the day we found out I was pregnant."
A doctor later told them the chance of both conceiving so quickly - given their age and fertility levels - was like winning Lotto, Cumming said.
She is now nine weeks pregnant, while Buchanan is 10 weeks and five days along. But while their babies are close in age, their pregnancies have been very different. Cumming has been nauseous 24/7 and barely able to eat, while Buchanan is ravenous most of the time and eating dispels what little nausea she gets.
Taryn has had nausea non-stop while Kat has been constantly starving. Photo / Supplied
The pair share a "lovely" midwife, and they plan to attend antenatal classes together once the pandemic restrictions lift, Cumming said.
"She's a great help, guiding us through this whole process ... It's a lot to think about, going from this single lifestyle and knowing only the basics about children to oh my God, we've got all these things to learn."
Cumming hopes they will give birth at least two days apart - close enough that their babies can settle into the same sleeping routine, but not so close they won't be able to support each other in labour and see their children born.
They picked the same donor so their kids would be genetically related and have "some sort of normalcy to everything", Cumming said.
"They'll already have a bit of difficulty with two mums and no dad, so being related and looking quite similar will be really great."
Both women's families were shocked but excited for them, Cumming said.
"It wasn't expected but it happened - we don't have lots of eggs but they're really good ones."
Kat and Taryn were told their chances of getting pregnant so close together were similar to winning Lotto. Photo / Supplied
With numerous inquiries from people trying to conceive, including single women and straight couples, the pair have set up an Instagram account and Youtube channel to document their experience, under the moniker 2 Bumps Same Love.
Since their pregnancies were made public they've had some strangers claiming they planned to run to the donor for child support money. In fact their contract with him wouldn't allow that, Cumming said.
"Me and Kat are solely responsible for these children, and we're the only ones on the birth certificate."
The kids won't know his name, but when they turn 18 they will be legally able to reach out and ask if he wants to meet.
Every donor pregnancy is different, Cumming said. "It's up to you and your decision. When you're so desperate to have a child you really are open to all sorts of different scenarios."
They've also been accused of getting pregnant in order to go on benefits, which has left them bemused.
"We didn't plan this - one of us was always going to carry on working."
