The hostess with the mostest

By MICHELE HEWITSON

A few celebrities around town will spend this evening washing their hair. It is quite difficult to wash one's hair when one is wailing at the unfairness of no longer being on the A-list.

But better, dears, to draw the curtains and do your wailing in a darkened room than admit that you have not been invited to the Louis Vuitton party.

A better ploy might be to let it be known around town that you have been asked not to attend because you are so high profile that your presence constitutes a security risk.

Whatever you decide, here's a little piece of advice: do not bother ringing Christine Belanger, the woman behind the Louis Vuitton A-list, begging for an invitation. For one thing, it's too late. For another, it's too undignified.

Belanger - her official title is the Louis Vuitton cup director; her sub-title is director of international events for Louis Vuitton worldwide - is far too discreet to name names, but there are "oh yes" more than a few people not beyond begging.

In fact celebs (or people who think they are celebs) do not usually call Belanger - mostly she keeps a low profile. They call her boss, Bruno Trouble, who wanders into the media conference room we're sitting in and bellows at an unseen someone.

Despite the humiliation of having to ask, or risk a Trouble bellow, the guest list for the social event of the year has grown from 1200 to 1300.

There are a few details that Belanger is willing to reveal. That 100 overseas guests will be flown in for the party (then put up at the Hilton for four nights.) That they will be"celebrities in their own country, very important press people ... not just press but more the fashion, style, life press". Such as the editor of Vogue Australia, Tatler Singapore, a crew from ETV. In other words, not hacks like me.

That the tipple of the night will be Moet et Chandon (she's not letting any secrets out of the bag there: Moet is the official champers of the Louis Vuitton cup.) That the food will be "tray food" catered by the Relish Group. That Inside Out are the event producers. That there will be a 17-piece band featuring singers Taisha, Larry Morris and Suzanne Lynch. And that there will be celebrities.

Who are New Zealand's top celebs? Well, Lucy Lawless is probably top of the A-list. Not that Belanger is saying that Lawless is, or is not, on the list, of course.

Belanger is so discreet that you could hang her upside down from the mast of the Louis Vuitton boat and she would still not squeal.

The one big thing that she will not tell you is the venue of the big bash. Those on the guest list are not meant to know either, until they get there. All they are told is that dress is black tie and that they should be a certain place at a certain time to await their carriage to the venue.

Here's a clue: the carriages will be ferry boats.

But, of course, Auckland is a very small town in which to organise a top secret do ...

The mystique "has always been part of the excitement and the game to keep the venue very special". And post-September 11, post-Bali, there is an increased security issue. So there you are celebs: a valid excuse.

YOU imagine that even after a good long hanging upside-down from a mast, Belanger would emerge immaculate.

The 45-year-old Parisienne is one of the few people on Earth who doesn't look like a prat wearing her sunglasses on her head, indoors.

She is dressed down for a day at the office in her pinstriped trousers worn over her patent leather strappy stilettos and below a little black cardigan buttoned just so.

This is her backroom look. So she asks, hopefully, whether the picture of this page is going to be a "a little photo?" No, a great big one. She looks slightly panicked. She is also mindful of the Louis Vuitton brand and asks one of her staff for the scarf from around her neck: it's got the name on it.

Talking of brands, how many Louis Vuitton bags has she got? "I don't know. Maybe four or five. Without the luggage."

I have asked whether that is one of the perks of the job.

She says: "No, not really. In fact, sometimes you would like to be able to carry someone else's bag." But, "it's a very nice thing to have but I would not take the job for that."

She has been involved with Louis Vuitton since 1995, with the America's Cup since the cup came to town. She has a background in maths and physics. But the big labels lured her, "by accident", into event management. Before the bag people she worked for Christian Dior perfume and Moet et Chandon.

For the six months she is in New Zealand she lives, this time around, in a nice house in Herne Bay with water views.

She has a husband, who lives in Paris. They speak every day on the phone. He will be coming for Christmas and Belanger plans "to take him to the Bay of Islands for New Year's Eve". She is a very good hostess. She once hosted a little do at her place and, worried that her guests might be cold, offered the women present a range of pashminas to wrap themselves in. Yes, she laughs, they all returned them.

Of course they did. You would not want to forget your manners in front of the always well-behaved Belanger. She will not comment on bad behaviour.

A reference to the exciting possibility of having Russell Crowe and Eric Watson in the same room at the same time arouses not so much as a raised eyebrow: she does not deign to acknowledge such silly speculation.

She is as practical as you might expect from someone who organises armies to organise her parties.

She does not get homesick for Paris. "The family and friends, I miss them more than Paris itself. I enjoy to go back, not to stay there. New Zealand, it is so much nicer: no pollution, no stress. I think it's a great country."

So, she'll be hoping New Zealand holds on to the cup then? Big surprise. Big Gallic gesture indicating no comment: "I won't say anything."

This morning Belanger will be at the secret venue by 8am. Her day will end at one or two am.

Although she wears New Zealand designers Trelise Cooper and Paula Ryan, tonight she will be wearing ... Well, let's attempt to drag one secret out of her.

"It's difficult to explain: it's pants wide at the ankle, and a top, matching. A deep burgundy. It looks like a fish, not sequins, scales. It's a French designer, not very well known. Bizou Bizou. Don't mention it to anyone."

I have caused her to raise her eyebrows to the roof with the story about the time a French ambassador almost caused an international incident by remarking that New Zealand women dressed like backpackers and soldiers. Belanger does not want to cause any sort of incident. But, given that this is about as much as the close-lipped French woman is going to reveal, it's irresistible.

Tonight, at the party of the year, Belanger will drink water all night, then, five minutes before all the celebrities turn into pumpkins at midnight, she might have a glass of champagne.

The glamorous life?

The next morning Belanger will be at the media centre at 8am for a press conference. Looking, no doubt, immaculate.