Tell someone, teen mother urges other abuse victims

A fundraising appeal aims to help at-risk and abused children. REBECCA WALSH reports.

Silhouetted against the light, "Sarah" laughs as she lifts her baby into the air.

The five-month-old is getting heavy.

Across the road a group of children, some of them Sarah's brothers and sisters, tumble around on a trampoline in the late-afternoon sun.

Next door a dog starts barking and two tiny kittens wander near the edge of the driveway.

Five months ago Sarah became a mother. She was 12 when she got pregnant.

The baby's father is Sarah's stepfather.

Now 13, Sarah is one of a handful of children seen by Starship children's hospital each year who have become pregnant to their abuser.

In some cases assistance for the child stops there, as the victims fall through the cracks of a system that is supposed to help them and punish their abuser.

Sarah was one of the luckier cases. She was helped by child abuse experts and her stepfather was prosecuted by police. He is now serving a 13-year jail sentence.

This weekend, Sky City and the Starship Foundation will launch an advertising and fundraising campaign aimed at helping children and young people at risk of abuse.

The appeal, fronted by actor Lucy Lawless, will raise funds to help medical specialists from Starship join police and Child, Youth and Family Services in a multi-agency centre.

The first centre of its kind in New Zealand, its aim is to stop children falling through gaps in the system. Children will be able to be treated by all three agencies under one roof rather than in different offices or even different parts of town.

Starship needs another $100,000 to refurbish its part of the building before the centre can open in August.

The first time Sarah's stepfather sexually abused her was in the middle of the night.

"I was 11 years old, I think. I was sleeping in the lounge room, me and my brother, and he just came back from drinking. He came and woke me up and I asked for my mum. He said no and I started crying. I kept asking for my mum. He told me to take my pants off."

Sarah told her mother, who promised to call the police, but didn't after her partner apologised.

Soon after, the touching progressed to sex "all the time" - in the park, in the bushes or at home.

Every night Sarah went to bed terrified about what would happen.

"I was having these bad dreams. They were telling me to tell someone. I told my nana. I was so sad I didn't know what to do."

Her grandmother took her to the doctor and it was only then they discovered she was pregnant.

The older woman was devastated her daughter had allowed the abuse.

"It really hurts ... She should have reported it straight away. Never mind about the partner, I said, you can get another one. [Your] daughter comes first."

Sarah not only had to come to terms with being pregnant, but coping without her mother.

"I was sad. That was the time I needed my mum beside me, holding me and hugging me. I was really lucky I had my nana beside me. I've been through a very hard time.

"I love my nana very much. If she wasn't here I would be in a foster family. I wouldn't have my brothers and sisters ... Inside me I would feel empty, thinking what have I done to my family."

Sarah and her brothers and sisters live with their grandmother. The 13-year-old, who is working to rebuild a relationship with her mother, advises anyone being abused to tell someone close to them and for those they tell to keep their eyes open.

Back at school this year, she just wants to pass her exams.

"It's cool. The first day I was nervous but I was happy. I was going back to school."

* Appeal details: Safe and Sound Appeal donation envelopes will be delivered to Auckland households from Monday. Donations can be made online at the Starship website or sent to Freepost Safe and Sound Appeal, PO Box 91939, Auckland Mail Centre.