Strategies for managers to earn a little respect

For managers stepping into a new role, respect may be a little difficult to garner. But psychologist John Groom says earning respect is more about people skills than professional ability.

"It really boils down to something that's really simple. At the end of the day we have no problems respecting and working with people that we like. It's about genuinely liking people and being liked."

Groom is the director of the New Zealand Mentoring Centre and says in Kiwi society it is important not to come off as though you think you know everything. A manager who is seen as the "new broom" will quickly fall flat.

"Take a cautious approach with a respect for both the previous leadership and the culture that you're working within. Otherwise what happens is you're seen as being new in the sense that you're flash and unsubstantial. Staff may not say it to you, but they'll ask themselves, 'How long will this last?'."

Staff won't respect a manager who comes in and tries to fix what's not broken. Groom says new managers should respect staff feedback and not dictate new ways of doing things from day one.

"Ask for the staff's help. Make projects cooperative. Look for buy in and respect what's already there."

Groom says it's important to be natural. Particularly if it's an internal appointment where a colleague may have missed out on the position you now hold.

"The ideal would be to be able to speak about it. 'What is this going to mean? I'm feeling a little nervous here'."

But finding managers with the confidence and maturity to conduct this sort of conversation is easier said than done.

"CEOs say over and over that it is difficult to get staff with both the technical knowledge and the people skills."

Managing an employee who missed out on your job, and who is causing waves, needs to be handled carefully.

"The person who didn't get the position should look on it positively as a call to review their career direction and career options and seek support for that."

In dealing with the overlooked employee, Groom recommends a four-stage process.

First, selectively neglect or ignore the person to give them some space.

"Allow the person a few days or weeks for adjustment. We all need time to grieve and readjust."

Secondly, if things don't improve, have a private meeting. Express empathy and be direct and open.

Third, consider some sort of intervention through an Employee Assistance Programme.

Fourth, if the person is still not being respectful, consider disciplinary action.

To be respected, managers need to have the real authority to inflict consequences on staff. Whether it's a salary review or the power to terminate someone's employment, managers need authority.

"In any job, if you've got responsibility but you haven't got authority, you're not set up to succeed.

"The person causing difficulty will have a track record. Often they've had some interpersonal difficulties. When I was in this situation as a young manager, the person who was having difficulty with me had some deep personal problems."

It's particularly important for young or new managers to develop the skills to communicate respect. Peter Harbidge, executive general manager of Hudson, says managers need to be aware that respect is never automatic.

"It would be foolhardy just to assume that just because you have a title, that respect would be forthcoming. If you've come from within the organisation then you have to regain that respect and re-earn it in a new position."

This is particularly true when we look at the interaction between Generation X and Y. Harbidge says today it is much harder to gain respect from younger staff.

"Generation Y identify themselves as leaders in waiting. The current thinking is that most staff are saying that they will pick who they will follow to a certain extent. People no longer equate position and technical knowledge with leadership."

Harbidge says to talk to them and find out what motivates them and what the triggers will be for their success.

Often people will only respect the know-how of someone else once they see it demonstrated.

"Relying on your formal authority and knowledge is not enough to secure the commitment of your employees."

If workers can't see leadership competencies in their direct manager, Harbidge says they may bypass their manager and seek roll models or mentors elsewhere thus making the manager less effective.

"There is a strong link between how a team performs and the leadership that you provide."

The manager's values and how those values are perceived to be consistently applied also speaks volumes. Does the manager walk the talk and pay attention to staff members?

"They will follow people they believe in. They'll follow those with credibility and qualities they admire rather than those in the right position within an organisation."

Employees respect people with a clear vision of how things ought to be done. To achieve this, Harbidge recommends asking some questions.

"The best advice anyone can ever give a new manager on the job is to learn the power of asking the right questions. Take time to get to know what drives your staff. Find out what they are seeking to achieve out of their work life."

Basic management skills such as treating every person as an individual and getting to know your staff will earn respect. Harbidge recommends asking probing questions such as:

* What do you regard as a great place to work and how many of those qualities do you see in this place?

* If you were in my job, what would be the first three things you would do?

* What three things should we continue to do and what three things should we stop doing?

If a manager communicates an action plan based on the results of these questions then respect is more likely, Harbidge says.

"If you showed from day one that you're there to support them and elevate their chance of success then that's a great outcome."

But sometimes the outcome is not so great. Harbidge says walking into a situation where there is a disaffected team that just refuses to engage is a mission impossible scenario.

"In those cases you're looking at a culture change, a change in the way people go about their business and their attitudes to their work. Often that means you need to look at changing the personnel."

The manager may not have done anything wrong but was just faced with a difficult situation. Here Harbidge recommends drastic action.

"Let them know what you're looking to achieve. Let them know what's expected of them. But if their behaviours and performance don't support that then you're best not to work with them."

And Harbidge says this is no reflection on you.

"Your mindset is that I can make everyone a success here. But there are some people that will fight that to the bitter end. You just have to accept that you're not going to win every one of those situations. That's OK."