KEY POINTS:
"It's stupid to open our Christmas presents today" I told Sanna, my Finnish girlfriend, on Christmas Eve. "Christmas is on Christmas Day. It's like suddenly deciding you can open your birthday presents the day before your birthday."
I think most expats would agree that one of the most rewarding aspects of living overseas is the exposure to new and interesting cultural traditions to find fault with and criticise.
Once upon a time, people in Finland opened their presents on Christmas Day, just like in New Zealand. But today most people open them on Christmas Eve. Christmas Eve's Eve is apparently growing as a concept.
"When will it end?" I asked. "I know it is not considered politically correct to criticise other cultures, but surely cultural relativism has its limits? When a culture so offends basic human rights, is it not a right-thinking liberal's duty to say 'enough is enough'?
Well I say "enough!" I'm standing up for the right of children everywhere to lie in bed on Christmas Eve too excited to sleep! For children to wake up bursting with happiness at 5am and run to their parents' bedroom and beg to be allowed to open their presents! For all kids to know that the 25th of December is Christmas, after all!
"Did you say something?" Sanna asked, looking up from the bow she was trying to untie on the present from my parents (Mum, please don't tie the bows so tightly).
"I said that I want to open my presents on Christmas Day" I replied, in a deep, adult voice.
"Well, you will," she replied, "when we go to my mother's family for dinner. And then on the 26th too, with my other cousins."
Involuntarily a smile forced its way on to my face. I didn't know if it was because Santa reputedly lived in Finland or just a perk of sharing Christmas with your girlfriend's family, but it seemed that at least three of my Christmasses had come at once.
Participating in these weird and wonderful - if morally bankrupt - cultural traditions is even more enjoyable than criticising them, it would seem.
In Finland, Christmas celebrations traditionally last from the afternoon of the 24th of December until the 26th. In New Zealand my family only celebrate on Christmas Day, which means some relatives spend it with other family and it is always over too quickly.
Three days of festivities in Finland gave us a chance to celebrate with all of Sanna's family and friends and eat and drink until we resembled the jolly fat man himself.
The food we were fattening ourselves up on was also very different from the ham, turkey and Christmas pudding I am used to. Three days in a row I was treated to an entrée of smoked salmon, caviar, smetana and endless varieties of pickeld herring. Always in accompaniment was Finnish rye bread and a shot of my choice of vodka.
This vodka (or schnapps) is an important part of the Christmas celebration. On numerous occasions during dinner, without any warning, the entire table erupted into one of many old "schnapps" songs. These are sung with as much enthusiasm as the All Black's new Haka, but conclude with tipping vodka down your throat instead of drawing your index finger across it.
The traditional Finnish main course is not popular amongst Sanna's family, who describe it as potato and carrot mashed together, so it was substituted with a variety of other food as diverse as pork and fondue.
I didn't really mind what the main course was - each day the entrée was so tasty and the schnapps songs so rousing, that by the time it arrived I was always feeling too full and light headed to eat much.
At some point during each Christmas meal someone asked me what we do for Christmas in New Zealand. I explained that most families have their own traditions. For instance, in my family we always have brandy butter sauce with our Christmas pudding, but none of my friends even know what brandy butter sauce is. I theorised that it is a reflection of our multi-cultural society and relatively short history since European colonisation.
Along with enjoying and critiquing other cultures, living as an expat has provided me with the opportunity to stand back and reflect on my own culture.
While New Zealand is not unified by a set of cultural traditions in the same way Finland is, some of the traditions that are prominent - like spraying fake snow in the corners of windows - seem pretty silly when I explain them to foreigners.
Perhaps they expect that somewhere as exotic and far away as New Zealand would maintain a tradition of eating kiwifruit and hobbit - rather than trying in vain to copy traditions imported by our distant ancestors and Hollywood movies.
Regardless, one thing that I have decided, is that traditional Christmas customs - whatever they are - are great.
As of this year apparently it is now a tradition in my extended family in New Zealand to sing one verse of Hark! The Herald Angels Sing before eating desert. I think this is great - the more stupid the tradition, the better.
- Matt Kennedy-Good
Pictured above: Sanna's little Finnish cousins Ella and Oliver with their Christmas tree
