1. My favourite piece of graffiti appeared on the door of an old shed with the legend, "No grils allowed". Somebody had put a line through "grils" and written "girls". Underneath, someone else had written, "What about us grils?"
2. Seen on a wall in a Parnell restaurant 25 years ago: "The first 10 seconds of your life can be very dangerous". Written underneath, "The last 10 can be pretty dicey as well".
3. There was a sign on a condom dispensing machine in the men's toilets at the Auckland University that read, "This has got to be the worst chewing gum I've ever tasted!"
4. In the early 1960s, HMNZS Otago was tied up alongside an Australian ship in Sydney. When we went to sea there was a great flurry of signals between Royal Australian Navy offices overlooking the harbour and Otago. Turned out the ship's number on the side of the ship had mysteriously changed from F111 to FIFI.
5. In Alpha Rd, Willoughby, Sydney in the '80s there was an old-fashioned red telephone box that had been marked with: "The Turdis", and underneath that: "Dr Poo lives here".
6. For years, just before Fitzgerald Glade on the road south to Rotorua, there was a large rock with "Jesus is Alive!" painted on it. Some wit had added, "No I ain't!"
7. At the railway crossing at Hinuera there was a problem with the barrier and to the sign explaining, "Arm broken", someone had added, "Leg OK".
8. After the 1987 Edgecumbe earthquake, on the Kingsland flyover,
"Come to Kawarau for a milk shake".
9. Must add another from Australia. On a shed at that beach one morning, graffiti appeared: "BONDI SUCKS." By evening it was completed: "AUCKLAND 7."
10. On State Highway 1 heading north of Auckland, many years ago, there was a large round boulder close to the road. Someone had painted on it, "Bobs One". A few kilometres further on was another slightly smaller boulder and written on it, "Bobs Other One".
Leave your ugly kid at home!
Tolerance just good manners
Heating leftover fish pie in the office microwave for lunch is a definite no-no, and now you might have to think twice about warming up your sausage roll. Adam Dinham, professor of faith and public policy at Goldsmiths, University of London, has drawn up a religious literacy programme to be presented to employers this week. New guidelines on the etiquette of using communal kitchens at work address keeping bacon rolls in a fridge shared with people whose religious beliefs prohibit them from eating pork. He said: "The microwaves example is a good one. We also say, 'Don't put kosher or halal and other ... special foods next to another [food] or, God forbid, on the same plate'." Halal and kosher food served at corporate events should be certified, and consideration should be given to whether to serve alcohol, the guidelines further suggest.
, with glorious features like a fountain, and avocado tub and carpet that even follows you into the bathroom...(Hat tip Peter Bell)
Picture this: By implementing a 5p charge for a plastic bag, the UK government has manipulated the people into providing them, thus enforcing recycling and saving businesses the cost. Or as @anandamide tweeted: "GETTING PEOPLE TO DO THIS IS LITERALLY THE WHOLE POINT OF THE CHARGE YOU LOBOTOMISED SHITLARKS."
Good read: Students find cheap rent living in rest homes...
Video: A comedy skit from Norwegian bodybuilders who visit the miniature town at the Lilleputthammer amusement park in Øyer, Norway...
