Where not to hang your hat. Spotted in Newmarket.
'The smug-bum South'
Allan says the notice to "Auckland visitors" somewhere in the South Island which said "anyone wanting to talk residential property will be removed from the premises" is a typical example of the parochial nature of South Islanders. He writes: "I left small-minded Dunedin 30 years ago to live in Auckland. I have lost count of the the times when revisiting Dunedin and Christchurch especially, that the first words out of a local's mouth are, 'I could never live in Auckland'. Invariably, they have never even been. It is so boring and predictable. Where is the legendary southern hospitality? A myth. I play music in a Ponsonby bar, where one learns to spot the tentative body language of new, post-quake arrivals from Christchurch in an instant. They are all gobsmacked by how friendly we are, and vow to never return to the smug-bum South."
Mere details
Jane writes: "Driving with the 11-year-old and the 15-year-old, we spotted four Vespa scooters on a tour around Takapuna. The younger pipes up, 'How cool are they! Can we do that mum?' Before mum can say a word the older says, 'Don't be stupid. Mum can't drive a scooter, I am too young to have a licence and your feet won't touch the ground!' To which the younger replied, 'details, details, details'. This exchange highlights the difference in my daughters' personalities perfectly."
Disruptive terrorists
London's Daily Telegraph reported in January that the "Darkshadow" jihadists from Tunisia and Ivory Coast, who had proclaimed their website-hacking would disrupt international travel, wound up merely taking down bus timetables in Bristol, England. (Source: News of the Weird)
