Puns for the highbrow: Who orchestrated this? (Via Reddit)
Lemon error doesn't grate
A reader writes: "Recently, some unsolicited mail addressed to my mother arrived at my place. It was promoting a lemon juice diet with rapid slimming capsules. Not only did she never live at my home, but in 1999 she passed away and was cremated. With her often macabre sense of humour, I can imagine her conjecturing on just how much slimmer this business thought she could possibly be ... "
Making a first class noise over nothing
"I was very interested to read about the protests regarding the Airways NZ Smart Approaches trial," writes a reader. "I live in Beachlands and if you took any notice of the map shown in the article, you will see that I live right under the existing approach path. We probably have many more planes fly over us daily than those in the trial and at all hours of the day and night. I don't have anything to complain about, the noises don't bother me or my young family. To those doing the complaining, stop being so elitist!"