No-play zone
An apology at Mitre 10 over its Playzone Swing & Slide sets reads: "The Swing & Slide set advertised in our current catalogue does not contain the swing or slide. The copy should read: 'Just add timber, swings and slide' ..." Bet there were a heap of unhappy children on Christmas Day.
Too much information
Ross writes: "Spotted in the window of Colon Hydrotherapy, Te Puke ... this quote: 'I once saw a Barbie doll shoe come through the view tube that had been in a woman's colon for 38 years.' Fair put us off our burgers."
Skateboarding menace
David writes: "Driving yesterday, I saw a 14-year-old kid coming towards me on a skateboard on my side of the road, completely oblivious to the world around him but very attentive to his cellphone. I waited until he was within a few metres of the car and then honked the horn really hard. He almost wet himself and fell off his skateboard! I didn't hear what he swore at me but it probably meant he had more right to the road than I did! Can we get a law passed about texting and skateboarding?"
Pointed joke
Scar story: "When I was 17, a good friend bought a small flick knife and was showing me the finer points of its use, saying jokingly, "I could even stab you if I wanted", and thrust it in my direction, only to realise when he pulled his hand back that there was no knife in it! Instead, it was firmly wedged in the muscle of my forearm. Needless to say he doesn't like me telling that story."
Aerial bird bait
Georgina writes: "We spotted an inflatable shark a few days after Christmas hovering over our house in Onehunga. It was being violently attacked by a flock of irate sea gulls - absolute hilarity!"
