Sideswipe: February 16: Smug beanbag

Some beanbags think they're just so much better than the rest.

Cops called on screaming league fan

A longtime resident of Panmure was left red-faced when a posse of anxious police officers rushed to her home. Her new neighbour had reported loud yelling coming from next door. She feared the longtime resident was being attacked. It turned out the newcomer hadn't been warned that her neighbour, in her 70s, is a rugby league fanatic who shouts at the TV whenever she gets excited with the onfield action.

Finns not so big in India

David Layzell was in India in December. He saw an article headed '20 most notable musical offspring', and at No 14 was Liam Finn, son of Neil. It read: "Big in New Zealand. Practically a made-up country. Who can keep tabs on what's really going on there, besides Lorde? I could tell you I'm a huge star in New Zealand and who would know the difference? Are you going over there to check up on it? Do you know how long the plane ride is? Enough to say, 'Forget it, you're huge in New Zealand'. Crowded House did eventually garner some fame in the US, but we were more resistant than our European counterparts. And Liam Finn is following in his dad's Anglo-friendly pop tradition. Which means he'll be huge in New Zealand and not so much here."

Stadium music just isn't cricket

"I'm struggling with the harsh and very loud trombones, cymbals, horns, drums, etc at the cricket," writes John Hodgson. "On the TV coverage, it's louder than the commentary. Turn the sound down and the commentary disappears before the 'music'. Is this a quirk of Sky TV's microphones, or is this actually how it is in the stadium? I can't imagine putting up with this mind-numbing, sense-jarring noise watching the game in person. Maybe the 'bands' are situated under the commentary box? Whatever happened to the selection of great music the stadiums used to play. How did we get this interminable rubbish instead?"

It's a dog's life for tenant

A reader writes: "My father-in-law and his partner came to stay with us recently and they brought a bottle of red wine given to them by their landlord. (They don't drink wine.) The bottle had an overprint on the label which said: 'L J Hooker. Thank-you for being a great Tenant. Merry Christmas. From your Owner.' I think they are coming round next Thursday with two collars and a leash for a nice walk in the park."