Sideswipe: Failbook

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LOL - If you don't get this, then you aren't a slave to social media.

Murderous case of munchies

A worker at Edmonton Portsmith Fuel in Cairns had a harrowing experience about 3am on Thursday when a man marched into the store armed with a machete. But it wasn't money he was after. Waving the large weapon, the man looked vicious and his order was simple - four pies and a packet of 20 cigarettes. (Source: The Cairns Post)

Toxic parenting

In Australia, it's illegal to smoke in your car if there are children in it, writes Andrew. "In Taupo, I just saw a woman standing having a smoke with a baby strapped to her front (so mum's face was about 8 inches away from her baby's). Does this not constitute some form of child abuse?"

Rugby hype let down by reality

A reader writes: "If rugby is such a religion in this country, and we live in a stadium of 4 million rugby fans, and Super Rugby is the most exciting and skillful rugby competition in the world - as we keep being told - then how come half the tickets for the World Cup remain unsold, and there are thousands of empty seats at Super Rugby games? Boom. Truth-bomb."

Self-service, more like

"Try calling Telstra's customer service line," suggests Jade. "At the end of every call they ask you to take part in a very short survey. There are only two yes or no questions: Has your issue been resolved? Was this the first time you have called about this issue? If you answer "no" to both, they just hang up ... technical issues or a good way to only ever get positive feedback?"

Intrepid motorists over a barrel

Petrol prices: "I was in the Far North last week and was amazed when petrol at the Waitiki shop just south of Cape Reinga was $2.90 for unleaded 91," declares one reader. Another says: "In Port Waikato, a remote town south of Tuakau, the petrol pump at the general store is around $2.55 a litre as it's so remote - but if you're out of fuel there is nowhere else to go!"

Making a fair fist of the job

More on colloquial names for jobs. "Cheese makers are called 'cheese punchers', says this reader. "My dad made cheese all his life in Matamata, as I did for a 10-week stint. Although very automated now, there was a time when workers would use their fists to break up cheddars prior to salting. Cheddar is clumps of curd left after whey has been drained off. The work was so hot and physical that I took to using a yellow plastic bowl with a four-cup capacity every time I had a drink of coffee. I discovered headaches from coffee withdrawal, so for the next 35 years have had only one cup of it a month."