A royal flush? One is not amused with this toilet humour - a very interesting (and somewhat off-putting) bathroom "decoration", spotted in an Auckland pub by Neil.
Helping Auckland Transport out
Nick writes: "Hey Auckland Transport, here's a free idea. When you sell my daughter a Hop card, it's the standard card everyone gets. You tell us it will take 24-48 hours for the 'student concession' to be loaded so if she uses it before then she will be charged the full adult fare. It's up to 'the computer' to make the change, because that's how 'the system' works. I put it to you that 'the system' is not working. It's like selling me a diet soda but telling me I can't drink it for another 24-48 hours because the calories will still be there. So here's the free idea, and you're welcome: Why don't you sell pre-programmed concession cards alongside the full-fare cards? They could even be another colour, that way there will be no mistakes made when the cards are issued and it has the bonus of allowing bus drivers to query an adult using a child's Hop card."
Who's the dick now?
An office bookkeeper who was sacked after accidentally sending a text to her boss calling him a "complete dick" has failed to convince a tribunal it was just a light-hearted insult. Louise Nesbitt mistakenly sent the text to her employer instead of her daughter's boyfriend who had been contracted for plumbing work at the office in Perth. Ms Nesbitt described her boss as a "complete dick", adding, "please try your best not to tell him that regardless of how you feel the need". She immediately realised her mistake, and sent a follow-up: "Rob, please delete without reading. I am so so so sorry. Xxx." She later blamed her sense of humour, but Fair Work Commissioner Danny Cloghan didn't buy it. "To call a person a 'dick' is a derogatory term to describe an idiot or a fool. The word 'complete' is used to convey the message that the person is, without exception, an idiot or a fool - they are nothing less than a 'dick'." (Source: SMH)
Space travellers
Astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) tweets: "If you're curious: First mammals to orbit Earth, in order: Dog, Guinea Pig, Mouse, Russian Human, Chimpanzee, American Human."
