KEY POINTS:
It was the speech Don was meant to give which John ended up giving, although Don was still kind enough to introduce John.
The end of year wrap-up for National Party supporters in the Northcote, East Coast Bays, North Shore and Helensville electorates saw John Key's first address as leader of the National Party, the speech billed as revealing who Key actually was, where he came from.
The crowd stand, slowly at first, as the former leader takes to the stage. He's ceded his speaking slot to Key. He speaks of Key's skills, and then:
"I invite you, John, to address the people."
The people stood again, quick smart this time, lifting their sights to the man who is about to urge the whole of New Zealand to lift their sights.
Then, somewhat anaesthetised by glasses of wine, ham on the bone and scalloped potatoes, they settle in to be entertained. Key is the successor to a guy whose own adviser described his delivery as akin to "watching paint dry", so the bar is low.
Maybe it was first speech nerves, or weariness after the round of media interviews, but they settled in to be further anaesthetised.
The one joke in the scripted speech - "I am by nature an optimistic person. I am, after all, a Blues supporter" - draws the obligatory titter, otherwise all is still.
There is a potted history of Key, the well-known state house upbringing, the mother who hated Muldoon.
Then the slogans to spell out what drives him and his vision for the nation roll out. There is the valuing of family, policies that encourage hard work and building "a sense of what it is that binds us together as New Zealanders".
Some slogans were made far more interesting by an occasional tendency to get into trouble with 's' and 'sh' sounds. Amusing soundbites aplenty await if the "one standard of citizenship" line becomes a regular.
"Excellence" was another wobbly, somehow emerging as excellenceseses.
Nonetheless, Key is big on excellenceseses. "My mission," he reads, " is to raise people's sights, to be fearless and imaginative in policies that encourage people to set their aspirations higher".
At the end, he says "thank you very much," like Elvis about to leave the building, and steps forward from the lectern where he stands, nods at the audience and walks off stage.
It is only later Key reverts to form, in front of the media, gimlet eyes snapping from one reporter to the next, quickfire unscripted answers coming out.
He's so focussed it seems any moment he might morph back into his younger self and start hollering "buy, buy, buy, sell!" And sell is what he's here to do.
Filing out, his audience say he was "very positive". All that excellenceses has worn down their defences. Letitia Reddington is rather more excited by her win in the raffle - a 1.5-litre bottle of Trinity Hill Cabernet Sauvignon Merlot blend, 2002. Signed by one John Key.
"I think it will be quite famous," she says. Not quite famous enough not to drink though. "I think we will celebrate [Key's] first major achievement with it."