Lizz Magasiva suffered three concussions and a permanent shoulder injury at the hands of her husband Pua. Photo / Mike Scott
Lizz Magasiva suffered three concussions and a permanent shoulder injury at the hands of her husband Pua. Photo / Mike Scott
Lizz Magasiva says she suffered three concussions during an abusive relationship with TV star Pua. Today she reveals the fairytale social media posts hid a dark secret which ended tragically with the actor's death. Carolyne Meng-Yee reports.
She covered up the bruises, the black eyes, the anger.
She covered up for him.
Instagram posts showed a picture-perfect life - but behind closed doors, Pua and Lizz Magasiva's marriage was punctuated by violence and darkness.
Lizz Magasiva told the Weekend Herald that she lived in perpetual fear ofher husband, but wanted to protect him at the same time.
"I loved Pua. He would threaten to kill himself if I went to the police - or kill me," she says.
She says he even threatened to harm her daughter.
Magasiva's suspected suicide in a Wellington hotel in May shocked the nation and prompted an outpouring of grief. His death has been referred to the coroner.
"The reality I was facing was it could've been me who died that night," Lizz says.
The 38-year-old former Shortland Street star had a secret shame, which was revealed this week after a judge lifted a suppression order, allowing for details of the actor's domestic violence against Lizz to be reported.
Lizz fought for the suppression to end. She says she wants the truth to be told to highlight how domestic violence can lurk in a relationship that appears from the outside, and on social media, to be perfect.
She says the reality was she was trapped in an abusive relationship and was too scared to leave or ask for help.
Pua Magasiva's diary - he described himself as an 'angry man'.
"It's so important to have Pua's name [suppression] lifted because the truth needs to be out and the truth creates understanding," Lizz says.
"I think we can all learn from this. I wish I had called the police but for my own reasons, I was trapped in a cycle. Domestic abuse is an important issue and being a teacher and a victim I think it needs to stop."
Pua's first wife had sought a permanent suppression order. She and other members of his immediate family declined to comment for this article.
Pua's cousin Fa'a Tonu Fili said the actor was like a brother to him: "We grew up together and were very close." He declined to respond to Lizz's domestic violence allegations, but noted: "Pua is not here to speak for himself".
The couple's relationship featured extreme highs and lows, Lizz Magasiva says.
Lizz, 33, who trained as a primary school teacher, says she suffered concussion at her husband's hands three times and cannot work.
She says she remains traumatised by the relationship and her husband's death and is on medication for anxiety.
She also remains frustrated at the reaction to the way Pua was "glorified" after his death - particularly by "celebrity" friends and family.
"They all knew what was going on but did nothing. It is so hypocritical."
Her message for anyone in an abusive relationship is blunt: "Get help or get out."
May 11: The night Pua died
The couple had flown to Wellington to see a friend perform at a comedy show. Pua started drinking before the flight and continued with a friend once they checked into the InterContinental hotel, she said.
Lizz says Pua drank often and "sometimes excessively, which escalated his anger".
Lizz Magasiva says she lived in constant fear of her husband - but wanted to protect him at the same time. Photo / Mike Scott
"At the show, he was openly drunk. I told him to be careful because it wasn't a good look. He started picking on me and accused me of flirting with the barman. He started kicking me so I left."
Lizz says she returned to the hotel and Pua followed soon after. As soon as he entered their room he "snapped", she says.
She says he hit her head against a table, which left her bleeding.
"I was hazy but managed to run into the bathroom. He was still chasing me and punching me. I went into the shower but the blood just poured out. When I got out of the shower Pua was dead."
She says she was dazed and bleeding but phoned 111 and the ambulance call-taker explained how to do CPR.
"I was upset, angry and wanted to scream but I had to try. I really tried to get him back.
"But I knew he was gone when I saw the policeman's face and he said 'I am really sorry'."
After Pua's death, Lizz found his diary at the back of a wardrobe. The pages were full of haunting images, tortured thoughts and self-loathing.
Magasiva's diary asks 'who am I becoming'.
"He talks about a side I haven't seen, which was admitting his violence, admitting his anger, admitting he had always been like this. It was really sad because he knew who he was.
This diary features haunting images, tortured thoughts and self-loathing.
"He knew how it was affecting me but he couldn't stop.
"What he didn't know was how he could fix it - it's never too late to fix yourself and I would've stood by him."
'He was passionate about acting, he was just fun'
Lizz says she developed a "celebrity crush" on Pua while listening to his Flava radio show. He was a breakfast show host on the station, which is owned by NZME, publisher of the Herald. He left the role last year.
They got to know each through Instagram in 2016 and a few months later, in October that year, went on their first date.
"I was attracted to Pua because he was funny, charismatic, and obviously there was a physical connection," says Lizz.
"He could hold a conversation and seemed easy to hang out with. He was passionate about acting, he was just fun. I liked to go out and he liked to go out and party."
The couple at the New Zealand Television Awards in November 2017. Photo / Norrie Montgomery
The besotted couple moved into Lizz's North Shore townhouse two weeks later.
Like Lizz, Pua also had a daughter from a previous marriage and she would visit once a fortnight. His daughter and Lizz's daughter, Laylah, were one year apart in age and became like sisters, she says.
But as she got to know the actor better she discovered a disturbing darker side. On social media, their romance appeared picture-perfect - but in private, she says, Pua quickly became controlling and brutal.
Laylah loved Pua, but not when he was "angry", she says. She tiptoed around him.
Public success, private darkness
Pua was passionate about acting and became a much-loved TV star, best known for his role on Shortland Street as nurse Vinnie Kruse and internationally as the Red Ranger on Power Rangers Ninja Storm, and in films including Sione's Wedding.
Pua Magasiva was passionate about acting and was best-known internationally as the Red Ranger from Power Rangers Ninja Storm.
While his celebrity star shone brightly in public, his personality at home grew darker, according to Lizz.
It only took a few weeks into their new relationship for Lizz to notice Pua's violent side.
She says they were at a 21st party when Pua became possessive and aggressive. He thought Lizz was "flirting" with a man dancing behind her.
"The next thing you know Pua slammed him into the floor. He started swearing and pushed me so hard.
"I should have walked away then. I expected him to say 'sorry' but instead he said 'It's your fault, you are a slut, you are a f***ing nothing'.
"It was always my fault and I started to self-blame and believe in it.
"I lost count how many times he would punch me. He always made me feel it was my fault. He would grab my hands and punch himself in the face — he would hit himself often."
Lizz claims Pua was controlling and would monitor who she socialised with — even turning up unannounced when she was out with her friends. He would choose or approve what she wore - "nothing too sexy" - if she wasn't with him.
She says she was not allowed to have a passcode on her phone so Pua could access her messages and Instagram account.
There were two times the actor was ordered by the courts not to contact Lizz, but she says he flouted this by using the Viber app that allows users to make calls, send texts and video messages.
'I was attracted to Pua because he was funny, charismatic, and obviously there was a physical connection,' Lizz says.
Initially, her friends thought it was "cute" that Pua was so protective of her.
"But he didn't like my friends and he didn't like me hanging out with them. There was one friend I trusted to call or text when he was violent. I would be locked in the bathroom and ask her to check on me the next day in case he smashed the door in."
One night after the couple hosted a Halloween party in 2017, Lizz says Pua was drunk and "physically aggressive" in front of his own daughter.
The couple argued after Lizz told her husband to go to bed. Enraged, he left the house and ran his wife over with his motorbike. He would drive drunk often, she says.
"I tried taking the keys away from him and hiding them but he was absolutely livid. I'd seen that side before but not this intense."
Pua Magasiva leaves North Shore District Court after pleading guilty to drink-driving in December 2017. Photo / Doug Sherring
Lizz says she still bears marks on her legs from when he drove over her. There are other injuries that she says are from previous violent incidents, but she says her concern was not for herself that night.
"I was mostly worried about my daughter, who heard everything and was terrified."
Police were waiting for Pua when he got home that night - neighbours had seen what had happened and reported it.
Pua pleaded not guilty but in March last year, the actor was convicted of drink-driving. He was sentenced to 80 hours community work and 12 months supervision and disqualified from driving for 13 months for the drink-driving conviction.
He was back before the courts in August, charged with driving a vehicle contrary to his limited driving licence. He had two previous drink-convictions from 2003 and 2005.
'I wanted to believe in the fairytale'
Despite the unfolding horror behind closed doors, Lizz still loved Pua.
Her parents were equally fond of the actor, but now say they had their own suspicions about his behaviour.
On social media the couple appeared to be enjoying a fairytale romance.
In August 2017, while in Queenstown, the actor proposed.
"Ever since day one he talked about being together forever and wanting to get married — it was a big deal for him."
Lizz says their relationship had extreme highs and extreme lows.
"After he hit me he would say 'sorry' even though he wasn't at all. I wanted to believe in the fairytale. I wanted to believe that — as much as Pua was violent and nasty — he was loving and made me feel like the only person in the world."
Despite her father's reservations, Lizz married Pua on April 14, 2018, at the Riverhead Tavern, surrounded by family, friends and select Shortland Street cast members.
Both of their daughters were flower girls and the day was "perfect", Lizz says.
Every Thursday the newlyweds had a "date night" together.
Last year, on June 14, the pair went to a Takapuna wine bar to catch up with friends they made on their honeymoon in Rarotonga.
But she says the night started to turn when Lizz disagreed with something trivial Pua said. She says he started kicking her under the table.
"I said 'I'm leaving, I'm not doing this,' — that would happen often.
"There were so many times at dinner he would get aggressive and I would leave, but I knew this would not go down well."
The couple were due to fly to Melbourne the next day so Lizz says she went home to bed. When Pua arrived home he threw the blankets off the bed and spat in her face, she said.
"I tried to calm him down and talk to him but he got another drink and came upstairs. It got really heated, he was incredibly angry. The switch had gone off. He pushed me, kicked me and punched me.
"He threw me on to the floor, put his hands around my throat and strangled me till I started spluttering. I saw black dots and then he stopped.
"I said 'I'm calling the police' but he smashed my phone."
She said she was battered and bleeding but finally freed herself from Pua and stumbled in the dark to Takapuna police station.
"There were taxis going past but I had no money or phone. I was bleeding, I would've looked horrendous.
"But thankfully a woman stopped to help me and ordered an Uber for me."
Lizz was interviewed by police but — to her regret now — eventually refused to sign her statement.
"I didn't want him to be charged because he had told me so many times if this had come out he would kill himself and he would kill me."
In a letter to the court opposing Pua's ongoing name suppression for assaulting her, Lizz said her "silence has not been the appropriate course of action".
"In the past, you have received letters from me which were carefully constructed under the supervision of my husband," she wrote.
"I love my husband and I would do anything for him, which included not signing a statement to the police ... and not being truthful so that I may always protect him."
Pua, she said, refused to acknowledge his domestic violence, fearing it would end his career.
"I wanted to face the truth together and speak truthfully but Pua desperately wanted to protect his career, so I was silenced."
Assault conviction two weeks before Pua's death
Lizz declined to sign the witness statement she gave to Takapuna police but the Crown charged Pua anyway.
Pua Magasiva leaves the North Shore District Court on April 26 this year after being sentenced for attacking his wife.
The actor was convicted of the assault and on April 26 this year - 15 days before his death - he was sentenced to six months' supervision and 70 hours community work.
He sought name suppression but it was declined after police and the Herald opposed the application.
An interim suppression order remained for 20 days pending an appeal and Pua died during that time. A judge later granted permanent name suppression, but this order was successfully overturned this week by the Herald and other media.
Even though Pua's conviction was kept secret at the time, the conviction led to him losing a movie role.
'Get help or get out'
The townhouse where Lizz lives with daughter Laylah, now 8, is now "a girly" home with soft pink furnishings and unicorns. The word "HOME" on their kitchen wall reminds them what they now have: a sanctuary.
There are a few traces left of Pua at the house – some Star Trek pictures and his two cats, Ninja and Jezebel.
Lizz says she wants women in violent relationships to understand they must "get help or get out". That is why she fought against Pua's name suppression.
"I enabled Pua, in a way, to be violent. I made excuses for him and made it easy for him to be that way.
"I want women to speak up and tell the truth. I have kept silent for so long.
"This whole relationship I made excuses for Pua. I lied to friends, to family and now I am silenced again.
"I have been silenced from the moment Pua died. I was further silenced at the High Court, which caused me more pain and stress."
On October 9, Lizz celebrated her 33rd birthday.
"Pua was going through my mind but I refused to let him get me down. He left on his terms.
"To be honest I didn't think I would get there. The reality I was facing was it could've been me who died that night."
Previous rape allegation
Three months before his wedding, Pua Magasiva was quizzed by police over a rape allegation.
Police confirm they interviewed Pua but no charges were laid.
Lizz says she is racked with guilt that she didn't do more to help the complainant.
She has since reached out to the woman and apologised to her.
At the time, she asked Pua what had happened but he persuaded her that the complainant was "wasted" and had "made up lies".
When she looks back at her own experiences, she says she has doubts that Pua told her the truth.
"I've got a lot of anxiety over the sexual stuff ... it makes me think of that rape accusation. From what I have experienced I feel I should've taken that more seriously and reached out to the woman."
The allegation prompted Lizz's father to ask her not to marry Pua. Her parents had concerns about Pua but Lizz made excuses for him – explaining away injuries and the smashed holes in the walls and wardrobes.
"At the start, it was little lies, but I would say to myself he won't do it again even though he was never sorry."
Ron Sadler says his daughter Lizz covered up the abuse because 'she didn't want to lose the marriage'.
Ron Sadler now realises his daughter protected him from hearing about the violence - but the "telling point" was when his granddaughter Laylah described how Pua had "placed his hands around Mummy's neck" indicating that he had tried to strangle her.
"It was extremely disturbing," Sadler told the Herald.
"But Lizz was very protective of Pua, shielding us from what was really going on. It's only since Pua's death, I ask myself what I could've done differently. I was at a loss as to what to do.
"I said to [Lizz's mum] Sherryl this would not end well."
'She didn't want to lose the marriage'
Sadler says Lizz always put on a brave face and told him Pua was undergoing counselling and there would be no repeat of the violence.
"She didn't want to lose the marriage. But to think he could've taken her life disturbs me. I agonise over that every day."
The hardest thing for Sadler was having to explain to his granddaughter that Pua was dead.
"Laylah just cried and cried. She bawled her eyes out for 15 minutes. I told her to think about the good times — think about Pua in a good light.
"Lizz was on the other end of the phone and said 'Laylah, Mummy and you are safe', and that's when I really felt it.
"There is never a time when someone should take their own life, nothing should be so difficult.
"I have never cried so much over someone and I couldn't work out in my own mind — were my tears for Elizabeth, Laylah or Pua?
"I liked the guy. I knew Elizabeth was happy and loved him but my emotion around this is dictated by should I have done more? Maybe there is an element of blame that I didn't do enough. It is such a tragedy."
Fallout with the Magasiva family
Lizz's relationship with the wider Magasiva family was strained from the beginning but deteriorated after Lizz told Takapuna police about Pua assaulting her and he was charged.
"I was immediately outcast from the family because I'd gone to the police," Lizz says.
"I remember Pua told me I needed to apologise to his family for going to the police."
Pua Magasiva, right, as nurse Vinnie Kruse in Shortland Street, acting with his brother Robbie.
The situation has deteriorated further since the legal fight to name Pua.
Lizz read a eulogy at her husband's funeral but claims she was told to keep it "nice and positive".
"Leading up to the funeral it was 'us' and 'them'."
Lizz Magasiva suffered three concussions and a permanent shoulder injury at the hands of her husband Pua. Photo / Mike Scott
At the wake after Pua's funeral Lizz says she and Laylah were asked to leave by one of Magasiva's sisters-in-law.
The animosity continues. The Magasiva family is refusing to hand over Pua's ashes to Lizz, she says.
Lizz says she cannot forgive Pua's family for their dismissive attitude towards her and Laylah, who misses her stepsister.
"I did nothing but lie for him. Why didn't they help him?
"It is absolutely heartbreaking not having his ashes. I feel I spent my life covering up for him but I still loved him. We never spent time apart so I want to hold on to the good times as much as the bad.
"It is closure and I wanted to spread his ashes in the water at Wenderholm Regional Park, that was a special place he loved."
WHERE TO GET HELP:
If you are worried about your or someone else's mental health, the best place to get help is your GP or local mental health provider. However, if you or someone else is in danger or endangering others, call police immediately on 111. OR IF YOU NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE ELSE: • 0800 543 354 (0800 LIFELINE) or free text 4357 (HELP) (available 24/7) • https://www.lifeline.org.nz/services/suicide-crisis-helpline • YOUTHLINE: 0800 376 633 • NEED TO TALK? Free call or text 1737 (available 24/7) • KIDSLINE: 0800 543 754 (available 24/7) • WHATSUP: 0800 942 8787 (1pm to 11pm) • DEPRESSION HELPLINE: 0800 111 757 or TEXT 4202
MENTAL HEALTH HELP:
If you are worried about your or someone else's mental health, the best place to get help is your GP or local mental health provider. However, if you or someone else is in danger or endangering others, call police immediately on 111. OR IF YOU NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE ELSE: • 0800 543 354 (0800 LIFELINE) or free text 4357 (HELP) (available 24/7) • https://www.lifeline.org.nz/services/suicide-crisis-helpline • YOUTHLINE: 0800 376 633 • NEED TO TALK? Free call or text 1737 (available 24/7) • KIDSLINE: 0800 543 754 (available 24/7) • WHATSUP: 0800 942 8787 (1pm to 11pm) • DEPRESSION HELPLINE: 0800 111 757 or TEXT 4202
