Political diary

Monday

The Diary knows from experience that trying to stop the loquacious John Boscawen when he is in full delivery is virtually impossible without rudely interrupting. The Act MP and Mt Albert candidate makes Jim Anderton, long the holder of the title of Most Verbose and Longwinded Person In Parliament, look positively taciturn. Those media who have dealt with Boscawen know he can not only talk the hind leg off a donkey, he is capable of dismembering the rest of the poor animal - and then some. However, even we were surprised that he could continue speaking to a meeting at Unitech with a chocolate lamington squashed on his head. While pandemonium broke out all around him, Boscawen barely paused for breath, although one hand did reach up to explore the goo. While an assistant hurled some of the cake back at Boscawen's attacker - People Before Profit candidate Malcolm France - Boscawen kept up the patter which had something to do with him talking to the St Lukes Community Association about something. No one, just no one, was going to deprive him of his speaking allotted time. Well, we suppose it all gives new meaning to being sconed ... Meanwhile, back in Wellington, TV3's political editor Duncan Garner gets a little tongue-tied at the Prime Minister's post-Cabinet press conference, referring to National's byelection candidate as "Melissa Key". John Key is quick to respond. "I'm not married to her mate. She's a candidate. That is about as far as the relationship goes." Then he ponders. "We could be Lee-Key. Hyphenated, of course."

Tuesday

Word reaches us that there was a third offender in the "Shock, Horror" outing of Shane Jones and Parekura Horomia for popping into a McDonald's for a snack during the hikoi protesting the absence of Maori seats on the proposed Auckland Council. What can you say about someone who will let their comrades take all the flak with nary a whisper? But take a bow Mita Ririnui. The sojourn has earned the trio the title of "The Three Macca-teers".

Wednesday

Trevor, Trevor, why do you do this to yourself? Education Minister Anne Tolley is responding to questions in Parliament from Labour's education spokesman Trevor Mallard about the Government's plans for national standards for reading and writing. He suddenly asks her how she spells "academies". Mallard says he has a document quoting the minister "that within an inch or so spells academies". He asks why the minister is promoting higher education standards and at the same time putting out a document signed by her riddled with spelling errors. The criticism, however, comes from someone who wrote an item on the Labour MP's blog site, Red Alert, which was riddled with spelling errors. The Diary pointed this out to Mallard. The mistakes were corrected. Well, at least some of them. The blog is still referring to something as being "incoherant". In Parliament, Nationals' Gerry Brownlee gets the last laugh on Mallard, asking Tolley whether she can confirm that it is likely that the people who wrote the ministerial document were educated some time during Labour's nine years in Government. Tolley is happy to so confirm, adding that Mallard was Minister of Education at the time.