Who are these people whose idea of fun is travelling halfway around the world to visit the birthplace of John Ballance and have dinner with Lockwood Smith and a side visit to Auschwitz?
If I were an MP's other half reading that my junket included an "expectation that the spouses and partners of the New Zealand Parliament's delegation will mingle and engage with their counterparts", I would be doing my darnedest to get lost on the way to the airport.
But there's no need for alarm about the cost, says clerk of the House Mary Harris.
First of all, we're only covering their flights, so they will have to pay for their meals and extras, although it's not hard to imagine a spouse saying, "I'm not that hungry, dear, so why don't you just upsize yours and I'll have a wee nibble."
And, although the numbers are a bit fuzzy, we are left to assume that MPs wanting to drag their spouses along will be swapping their Business class ticket for two economy ones.
Doesn't your heart melt? Our hard-working politicians are willing to sit in economy just so Gladys or Sam can come and watch them being amazing.
But it raises the question: if they can survive an economy class flight accompanied by a partner, why can't they survive an economy class flight without them? That would save even more money and spouses.
Would-be drivers in Auckland are having to wait months longer than they should to sit their tests and get their licence. The New Zealand Transport Agency, which looks after this, obviously is not doing its job. No other way to describe it. Yet NZTA says it can't offer any guarantees about improvement and doesn't know why it has happened.
Robyn Elston, NZTA national manager, delivery, told 3News that, "What I can say is that wait times are a critical performance measure for us in terms of making sure that New Zealanders can get access to testing."
The jargon, "critical performance measure" and "get access to", is worth savouring for its own sake. By any measure you'd have to be critical of that performance.
But what should most concern us is yet another example of an increasing tendency for people whose job it is to answer questions and provide explanations to refuse to do either but, instead, to meet reasonable queries with obfuscating corporate waffle.
And they are being allowed to get away with it. There was no follow-up question to Elston.
In the interest of public access to basic information about services we pay for, journalists should be not just permitted but required to respond to such blather by saying: "That's bullshit. Please answer the question."
