Of course we want to protect our kids. These days, sex and drugs are pretty much on tap for young people. But I'm not convinced hiding sex and drugs from teenagers "until they're old enough" is the answer.
Where sexuality is concerned, there are still many taboos in modern culture. Sex may be flaunted as a marketing tool, but it's still steeped in chagrin.
For example, our culture reinforces the notion that women who enjoy sex are damaged goods, whereas the same behaviour in men is heroic, expected even. We're murky around the issue of consent, as the Roastbusters case revealed. And our popular media makes it clear that certain bodies and sexual identities are more desirable than others.
When I was young, sex was a mystery. In school, we didn't learn much past "use protection" and "don't get pregnant".
We didn't learn the science behind sexual attraction, and why sex creates a bond. Or what consent looks like. Or there's little resemblance between Dawson's Creek love scenes and reality. Or there's more to sexuality than simply "straight" or "gay".
Some schools are more savvy these days. But then I read about school principals rejecting proposals from Family Planning to actually tackle the subject of sexual pleasure -- and wonder how far we've come.
If we restrict books like Into the River, we're further contributing to the mindset that sex is, ultimately, shameful. A forbidden fruit, something kids can only talk about in whispers, lest their parents find out.
Teenagers are going to be curious about sex, that much is true. But, if they're going to make good decisions, they need to be armed with information; to feel free to ask questions; to have frank discussions about sex in the media, and how it plays out in their own lives; to learn the importance of respect.
It's time we fronted up, and talked to our teens. Because censorship doesn't cut it.
