Unison's Hastings HQ. There is more chance of Judith Collins becoming PM, than there is of Unison being sold, says Craig Cooper.
David Scott wants to see the consumer-owned Hawke's Bay lines company Unison sold.
Having lived in Wellington, Scott may have some affinity with this observation.
He is squirting a garden hose into a 140km/h southerly.
Scott has floated the idea of selling Unison - a company controlled by the Hawke'sBay Power Consumers' Trust - and reckons it could reap consumers $10,000 each.
Power trusts that give profits direct to consumers keep things simple, and focus on managing and protecting their (hopefully) profitable monopoly.
They guard the assets, rarely promote change and are bound by legally watertight deeds that protect the family silver.
The good thing about Scott's pie in the sky idea is that it highlights the outdated, conservative approaches that these trusts have locked themselves into in New Zealand.
Because they could change, for the better of Hawke's Bay.
The buzz word these days is 'pivot' - the ability to react to changing markets, make change and move forward for the maximum benefit of your consumers or customers.
But Unison being sold is as likely as Judith Collins becoming PM. A big fat zero chance.
Scott asserts that the Hawke's Bay Power Consumers' Trust is asleep at the wheel.
That's slightly unfair.
For any power trust that pays dividends direct to consumers, to work successfully, only the company CEO and trust chair need to be fully alert and awake.
The rest of the trustees can potentially snore happily in the rear caboose of the gravy train. Come election time, trustees will say otherwise.
The watertight deeds, which on one hand protect the family silver, stem progressive change with the other.
A shame, because the Hawke's Bay region isn't getting the maximum benefit from Unison's profits.
It's a worthy notion to put cash in the pocket of whoever controls the household power account.
It's also safe and less risky when it comes to getting re-elected.
Individuals benefit and hopefully most of the money gets spent locally.
But what are the tangible benefits for the region?
The best mode of operation would be for the trust to invest profits in a consolidated fund, grow the investment and give it back to the community.
A shining example of this exists not far from here. The Rotorua Energy Trust does not give money directly to consumers.
It gives money to its 'community', from a consolidated fund formed back in the day when the electricity industry was deregulated.
Energy trust money has enabled multiple projects that make the region and Rotorua city a richer place for everyone who lives there - not just the person whose name is on the power bill.
Hawke's Bay could potentially enjoy the benefits of a mixed model - consumers get some money and the rest is invested, and given to communities.
Imagine the benefits for communities struggling with housing and social issues.
But it won't happen.
To be fair to Hawke's Bay Power Consumers' Trust, it has made one significant change in recent years.
But it was forced upon them.
Just a few years ago, consumers got a cheque in the mail. And the trust rebanked a nice wee 'profit' for its consumers, from the cheques that never got cashed.
However, given cheques have gone the way of the moa, consumers now receive a direct credit.
As for Scott, he has been referred to as a 'predatory shark'. Sharks can't swim in watertight power trust deeds.
Scott's as much threat as a dolphin standing on its tail, showing off.
Maybe next year's local body elections - which include roles on the power trust - will give us a clue as to why.
In the meantime, don't expect any changes. The early Christmas card with some money inside will continue to arrive from Nana.
Except now she puts it straight into our accounts.