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She is a woman torn between two loves.
But although Royal New Zealand Ballet dancer Yu Takayama plans to leave one for the other - she says the move will be temporary - she has vowed she will one day be reunited with both.
The New Zealand-based Japanese star took to the stage for the last time in Auckland on Saturday, before heading back to Tokyo with her partner Jo Funaki to get married.
Takayama, who starred as Kitri, the lead female dancer in the Meridian Season of Don Quixote, calls New Zealand her "other love", and says she will definitely return one day to make this their permanent home.
"I just love New Zealand so much," Takayama told the Herald.
"I will miss everything about New Zealand, from the peacefulness to rugby, which I have grown to love."
Takayama says she is hoping to do one last "international stint" with a "truly international ballet company" such as the Paris Opera Ballet, before returning to New Zealand "maybe not as a dancer".
"A dancer's career is very short, and I just want to make one more big hit before I get too old," said the 34-year-old.
Takayama's career has included solo and principal roles at the Zurich Ballet (2003), Tokyo's New National Theatre (2002) and Asami Maki Ballet Company (1993-2000) - but she burst into the spotlight here in 2004, when she was cast in the lead role of Madame Butterfly shortly after joining the RNZB.
Wowing critics in that performance, reviewers labelled her "a sublime butterfly" and proclaimed "her feather-like lightness and grace captured the ill-fated geisha perfectly".
In the performances to follow over the next five years, Takayama was the clear crowd favourite as she played lead roles in shows such as Coppelia and Giselle.
But she may be best remembered for her stunning performance in her portrayal of Cinderella in Christopher Hampson's version of the fairytale classic last year.
"I feel like crying when I think that this may be the last time I will be sharing the stage with my fellow New Zealand ballet dancers in Auckland. They have become really like my family here," said Takayama.
Don Quixote heads to Hamilton, where Takayama will perform her final New Zealand show on December 10. Her decision will be a great loss to the RNZB and New Zealand, said artistic director Gary Harris, who described Takayama as an "immensely talented dancer".
