Mary-free zone will be blissful escape for HRH

Prince Charles will find New Zealand more to his liking. Every day he opens the newspapers he won't see himself gazumped by that Australian real estate agent turned Crown Princess of Denmark, Mary Donaldson.

His Royal Highness had copped the raw prawn in touring Australia this past week. His has been the B royal tour, unfortunately timed to coincide with the visit of Mary and hubby Crown Prince Frederick.

The Age newspaper in Melbourne likened Charles' visit "to interrupting a rave party with God Save the Queen".

While they voted to continue their ties to the British monarchy rather than become a republic six years ago, Australians today seem much more interested in the Danish monarchy.

They have been seduced by the story of one of their own. A good-looking Tasmanian girl meets a Danish prince in a Sydney pub, falls in love, eventually marrying him to become a foreign princess.

For the past week, the Australian newspapers and TV channels have been full of Mary.

There has been much gushing: headlines of "Hail Mary" and "Fairytale as girls meet a princess" and stories detailing her every move.

Sydney's Daily Telegraph takes some beating: "The Danish Crown Princess, who has quickly gained a reputation as a fashion icon, looked rested and radiant in a cream-coloured jacket, black trousers, floral scarf and white leather loafers. Her trademark gracious smile was evident soon after she arrived at 9.20pm," it reported on day one. It takes you back to the reporting of royal tours of yesteryear, though HRH Queen Elizabeth II wasn't noted for her white leather loafers on trips Downunder.

The Sydney Morning Herald was not far behind a few days later: "Tall and pale, she wore a white knee-length Chanel dress and stilettos.

"A deep-purple belt showed off her tiny waist, dispelling any speculation she could be pregnant."

Telegraph reporter Nicole Casella even remarked on the number of people who had mentioned how much she looked like Mary.

The gushing didn't stop with the media.

Health Minister Tony Abbott, a noted monarchist, told guests at one of the numerous charity luncheons and dinners that the princess' marriage to Prince Frederick was a "gift to the people of Australia".

"I want to thank Princess Mary for reminding a sceptical world of the magic that can be involved in the monarchy," he said.

 

But it hasn't all been peaches and cream-coloured jackets.

Danish newspaper Ekstra Bladet's royal correspondent, Anne-Mette Gregers, said the Danish media were despairing of the blandness of the tour, which until earlier this week had comprised mainly private functions which prevented Australians, who were paying for the visit, getting close to the princess.

"Meet the people, Mary. Go public," said the newspaper.

Hobart Mercury columnist Greg Barns wrote that Tasmania was showing all the signs of becoming a "cringing and embarrassing colonial outpost".

"The nauseating publicity given to a woman whose only claim to fame is that she met a bloke in a Sydney pub, married him and now lives a taxpayer-funded, privileged life in a castle in Denmark is evidence of this," said Barns, a well-known republican supporter.

Author Jacquelynne Wilcox warned in the Australian newspaper that Mary should be wary. The euphoria might not last, she said.

"Australians remain uncomfortable with success and will readily cut someone down should they get above themselves."

She complained of Mary appearing "more rigidly royal" at her wedding "than those born to it", forgiving her at the same time the elocution lessons "that wiped any trace of Aussie accent". Perhaps Wilcox has a point. On Enough Rope, an ABC entertainment programme, interviewer Andrew Denton asked Mary whether she had had any lessons in royal waving.

"No, that came naturally," replied the princess. Husband Fred gave away the big secret when Denton persisted, asking whether there was a "a special sort of wave you're meant to do when you're royal?".

"It's like putting a bulb into a lamp. You just hold your bulb and then you [making royal bulb-twisting motion] screw it in like that," replied the helpful prince.

Out in the woop-woops of Alice Springs, Prince Charles was inspecting a new-fangled dunny at the Centre for Appropriate Technology. It may have looked like your unsophisticated outback dunny on the outside, but inside it was an odourless, flyless, waterless toilet. To the delight of the locals, Charles popped inside for a visit. Despite playing second-fiddle to Mary and Frederick, Charles has attracted warm, good-humoured crowds during his Australian tour. He might appear stuffy but he is an old hand at "the meet and greet" royal routine and might have been able to give the newcomer on the block a tip or two had they met. Tip one would surely be: get out and mix with real people.

* Prince Charles arrives in Dunedin this evening. His public engagements in Otago include a church service at St Paul's Cathedral on Sunday morning and a visit to the Royal Albatross colony at Taiaroa Head.

On Monday he will visit a Central Otago sheep station before flying to Wellington in the afternoon for a welcome at Government House.

Prince Charles will lay a wreath at the National War Memorial, launch an urban design protocol at City Gallery, and visit Te Omanga Hospice.

He will then fly to Auckland where engagements include visits to the Auckland War Memorial, a primary school and the opening of a children's garden in the Botanic Gardens in Manurewa.

- NZPA