Nanaia Mahuta is Ian Foster. Kieran McAnulty is Joe Schmidt. But, on the basis of what he said on Newstalk ZB this morning, he's going to be pushing it uphill.
He was banging on about visiting a truckload of councils recently and planning to visit a truckload more, and saying the message he's getting from them is that they don't have the money to implement the water reforms.
And he was saying that the Government has listened and it's going to be dishing out at least $350,000 to every local authority in the country to help with the costs they're already incurring because the Government forcing this change on them.
There are people in councils up and down the country already working on making the Three Waters reforms happen and, until now, ratepayers have been picking up the tab for that work.
So the Government's helping out, giving all councils about $350,000 each.
Kieran McAnulty also talked about councils telling him that they don't like the idea of "the local voice", as he put it, being lost when it comes to water.
And so he's going to take that message back to the Government. But there's a big difference between listening and hearing, isn't there? So he can talk all he likes about listening but I don't have much confidence that the Government wants to actually hear what's being said about Three Waters.
Even when it does listen - as McAnulty is saying it has in relation to the Government dumping money in every council's bank account - the arrogance of it all is quite something.
Especially when it comes to the assets the Government wants to take off our local councils, saying it's doing it for our benefit.
The Associate Local Government Minister was saying today $185 billion needs to be spent to bring the country's Three Waters infrastructure up to scratch. And the Three Waters reforms are a great thing because that $185 billion is going to be taken off the shoulders of ratepayers and put on the shoulders of taxpayers. A great idea.
But remember, councils will not only lose control of drinking water, wastewater and stormwater services, they'll lose ownership of the infrastructure too.
The Associate Local Government Minister seems to think losing our assets will be offset by councils not having to front up and pay that $185 billion he says is needed to get our drinking water, wastewater and stormwater up to scratch.
But I don't buy that for a minute. And, as far as concerned, this announcement by the Government that it's going to give money to councils to help them implement these water reforms, is just adding insult to injury.
The Government says it's support but in my book when you pay someone to do something they don't want to do, it's bribery.
