I have decided I want to stay.
Though it seems like a good portion of Christchurch's people are leaving the city for new lives without the constant fear of another earthquake - and who can blame them - this is still the place I want to be.
I have to point out that I'm one of the lucky ones. I got out of my office alive and unhurt after last week's devastating quake.
I have not lost a loved one or close friend. My house seems undamaged in a suburb largely unscathed. I have electricity. I have running water - having to boil it is only a minor inconvenience, as is going without showers and washing clothes. I didn't have to shovel silt off my property or street.
Sure, it was frightening. As was last September's big shake. And the ongoing aftershocks do leave you on edge. But I still love this city that has been my home for the past 12 years or so.
If anything, after last week's tragedy, I love it even more. That's because there is a spirit of resilience and comradeship in this town that I have never seen before.
In a place where many stick to their own tight social circles, people are now sharing a common bond with strangers. They are determined to get through this, and are going out of their way to help others.
There is the usual minority of scumbags looking to take advantage of others' misery, and those who moan endlessly about the small things. But on the whole, people are showing remarkable tenacity, and just getting on with it.
The most common things you hear from people are "we feel so lucky", and "there's always others worse off". It's perhaps a bit cliched, but I feel the same way.
In fact, after having a couple of nights out of town at the weekend, I was keen to get back.
So now I have decided I want to stay, there are the questions over what lies ahead.
I recently put my house up for sale, with a plan to go renting in Christchurch afterwards. I'm wondering what will become of the housing market now, and what sort of home I will end up in.
And there is the nagging thought of what would happen if another big quake hits.
Maybe next time the epicentre will be close to where I live and I will be affected much more severely. Maybe the building I'm in won't stand up to the shaking next time.
But I can't dwell on those things. Because I could be hit by a bus while crossing the road too. Or a plane I'm on could fall out of the sky.
To a certain degree, you have to let things go and accept there are some things you can't plan for or control.
Maybe my plan to stay will have to change as my circumstances do.
But I do believe the city can, and will, rebuild stronger than ever. I do believe this rough period of seismic activity will pass. And I want to be there when Christchurch comes out the other side.
Jarrod Booker: Why I'm going to stick with my shattered city
Buildings are in ruins, but amid the devastation, people are sticking together and are determined to triumph. Photo / Dean Purcell
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