Sideswipe

Doing the Thorazine shuffle: An old ad for Thorazine, which can 'control the agitated, belligerent, senile and help the patient lead a composed and useful life'.

A column in the Observer has nifty advice for those planning on cohabitation, suggesting there are 25 things women shouldn't do within a month of moving in with a man ... Here are five of them:

1. Try to install your retinue of cuddly toys on the bed.

2. Trace a circle around his nipple with your forefinger while you are lying in bed and say "Am I special? Am I? Am I?"

3. Leave shoes and half-empty handbags in every room in the house (permissible only after the three-year mark).

4. Suggest that, now you are living together, it might be worth opening a joint bank account and making a will.

5. Present him with a kitten or puppy and the word "surprise!"

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Puzzled by Helen Clark's reference to "the beltway" in relation to Taito Phillip Field, a reader checked Wikipedia and found this explanation: "Inside the Beltway: In the White House of Richard M. Nixon, it was said that Watergate would become serious only if it got outside the Washington Beltway." Perhaps Helen should avoid that particular Americanism.

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The tattoo-removal business is booming, according to a Fox News report claiming that formerly trendy Chinese-language tattoos were often mistranslated, either accidentally ("blood and guts" translated as "blood and intestines") or deliberately (e.g. tattooing the Chinese words for "gullible white boy"). A removal service in Beverly Hills said it takes off at least seven Asian tattoos a week.

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A reader writes in defence of the Yank tank: "It was with interest that I read in Sideswipe the favourable comparison of a Morris Minor and a Toyota Prius regarding fuel efficiency. Based on those figures I worked out that my 1979 Chevrolet (5-litre V8, running on LPG) would go from Auckland to Waiouru for $3 less than a Prius. And with LPG being a cleaner-burning fuel it is more environmentally friendly and better for the engine. Added to this the fact that the car was bought for $15,000 12 years ago and is now worth more than $25,000, then by not upgrading to a modern efficient car, I've saved the planet the resources and considerable energy that goes into making a new car and saved a lot of New Zealand dollars going overseas. So big is not all bad."

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Fifty-seven per cent of Americans could identify J.K. Rowling's fictional boy wizard as Harry Potter, while only 50 per cent could name the British Prime Minister, Tony Blair. This week's poll by Zogby International revealed that just over 60 per cent of respondents were able to name Bart as Homer's son on the television show The Simpsons but only 20.5 per cent were able to name one of the ancient Greek poet Homer's epic poems, The Iliad and The Odyssey ... Hang on. There's a sort of smug "I-can't-believe-people-don't-know-works-by-Greek-poet-Homer" reaction expected here, but really, how can you compare a 20th-century animated masterpiece with 17 seasons of prime-time coverage (plus re-runs) across the globe with an Ancient Greek poet? And, personally, I'm quite impressed that half of the Americans surveyed know who Tony Blair is.