KEY POINTS:
A reader was holding a house-warming having recently bought a two-bedroom villa in Ponsonby: "One colleague asked me how much I paid for the property. I replied $760,000. Then he said, 'That's really cheap. I didn't know you could still buy a house for that much these days.' His secretary just stood there, completely gobsmacked. About three weeks ago she purchased her first house in Henderson for $350,000 ... and that was understandably a huge amount for her, being a single parent and all."
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The owner of a Cincinnati steakhouse asked O.J. Simpson to leave minutes after he arrived on Friday night with a party of 12. Jeff Ruby told Simpson to his face: "I am not serving you." Ruby, who had served Simpson many times at his restaurants before the 1994 murders of Nicole Brown and Ronald Goldman, of which Simpson was acquitted, was offended by the attempted publishing last year of Simpson's book, O.J. Simpson: If I Did It, Here's How It Happened, and the television interviews scheduled to go with it, all of which were cancelled after negative public reaction. Ruby said the 50 or so people in the private room where Simpson had been seated stood up and applauded when Simpson left. (Source: Courier-journal.com)
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Glastonbury festivalgoers will get a bum deal this year - organisers are issuing every one of them with a free toilet roll. Each ticketholder will be provided with his or her own supply of recycled loo paper. Event founder Michael Eavis, who owns the Glastonbury site, has made a deal with toilet tissue makers Nouvelle. He says the move will make the festival more environmentally friendly.
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A friend, whom for the sake of anonymity we shall call Mr B, left a disastrous marriage and went to live with his old Dad. At his former wife's insistence he had, several years earlier, had a vasectomy, something he now regretted, particularly as he had just met a young woman very interested in breeding and all that accompanies it. He underwent procedures to have the operation reversed and awaited confirmation of success from the doctor. On the fifth day of waiting his father answered the phone. The medical voice on the line, full of Auckland professionalism, verified that he was Mr B, and proudly stated, "We have good news, your sperm is now coming through!" The old man coughed. "I am 82, a widower and somewhat wearied by the fathering and raising of six children - I am indifferent to the state of my sperm. You may, however, get a more enthusiastic response from my son!"
