KEY POINTS:
For the person who has everything? "Dry your ears the natural way", says the packaging. Now there's an idea. (Source: Mental Floss Magazine)
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A bemused customer writes: "I recently visited a central-city bed retail outlet and found the sole staff member fast asleep on one of the display beds. Together with another couple, we tried to wake the lady, without much success. Then suddenly, from a deep sleep, the lady leaped to her feet, explained how sorry and embarrassed she was and without missing a beat finished by stating, `Shows that this is a quality, comfy bed, one which I recommend you should buy'. Enterprising approach to sales, and a great comeback."
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A reader writes: "We invited our Belgian friends for a barbecue. They have been in New Zealand for three weeks and sometimes struggle with the accent. They asked what wine to bring. I suggested sauvignon blanc but they didn't understand. After a roar of laughter from the husband, he explained his wife thought I said, `Bring seven young blondes'."
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Not what you'd call a populist brand: Hell Pizza is yet to capitalise on the new deadly sins announced this week, but last month it did manage a swipe at Sir Ed Hillary. This spiel from a Hell brochure: "Without wanting to seem heartless in this national period of mourning, it is worth pointing out that Edmund Hillary outlived his little buddy Tenzing Norgay by nearly 12 years. So perhaps next time you order a delicious HELL pizza full to the brim with the finest ingredients, it would be a good idea to let us do the heavy lifting and make it a home delivery."
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Talk is cheap: Further to the $5000 worth of plastic toys in the allegedly environmentally conscious Mitre 10 Ultimate Dream Home ... a reader writes: "What about the week that the teams concentrated on the laundries and both teams elected not to install clothes dryers to be energy-efficient? What was the prize that week? A spa pool _ now that's energy efficiency at its best."
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Lloyd Brady says the silver seals on bottles of milk serve the useful function of preventing them from leaking. "If you have ever bought milk and put the shopping bag on the seat of your car only to have it topple over during the journey and have milk leak on to your upholstery, then you will be so very grateful this is unlikely to happen again. The smell of stale milk in a car takes a lot of getting rid of."
Today's Webpick: Notorious Australian ex-villain Chopper Read now fronts an advice segment on Maori Television's youth series Matatahi (Fridays at 8pm). In the first clip he offers advice on how to get into the music industry: "A body full of tattoos and some strong lyrics." Watch it here.
These are the very best online videos from Ana's online magazine Spare Room.