Sideswipe: Temperature police

Glenn writes: 'The street was High St on a very quiet morning. As if there aren't enough constraints on using bicycles and scooters in the heart of the city that they have to tow them away also - and look at the size of the truck!'

Temperature police at Shanghai Airport. A reader writes: "We were greeted with several medical inspectors, completely gowned in boiler suits and wearing face masks and goggles, taking everyone's temperatures on board the plane before disembarking. I thought that was taking 'containment' to new extremes, especially as once disembarked there were no further notices on what to do if you got sick once in the country ... It looked like something out of a movie."

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In this day and age of PC and paranoia (swine flu and Bull Rush) it is great to see a school in Tokoroa is still operating as in the good old days! Recently seen in the local school newsletter: "Caught Being Good Award: Robert for letting Kate use his mouth guard so she could play Bull Rush."

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Marketing failure No3: "Vodafone has twice mailed me a silver envelope containing a teabag and a card saying, 'Put the kettle on ...' So imagine my annoyance when both teabags ripped when I tried to remove and use them - and then my amusement at the tart little note in small print, 'Tea bag for promotional use only and not intended for consumption.' My conclusion? It has demonstrated ineptitude and mixed messages: great for a communications company!"

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Shave a Shortland Street Has-Been, is how Karl Burnett listed his Trade Me auction: The self-deprecating former soap star, last seen on a reality TV weight loss show, is trying to shave his head for charity. His listing reads: "My girlfriend says my hair makes me look a little retarded and wants me to cut it. I maintain that it does its job of keeping my head warm. It also helps keep away the other ladies (who usually dive on me in the street upon seeing my decidedly average beauty). I have, however, given in. My locks must go. And since my father passed away this year from the big C I decided I'd donate my mullet to science." The bid is standing at $100 and closes on the 29th.

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Wal Warehi Britton comes back for more (and he does have a point for people not familiar with the intersection): "What the knockers failed to appreciate was the fact that there are two conflicting signs. I have attached another photograph to illustrate how incongruous and ambiguous the 'Turn left with care sign is'. This photograph shows the van and the car approaching the Gillies Ave on-ramp to the motorway. They are in the left hand lane which starts hundreds of metres back. The 'Turn left with care' sign is ahead on the right hand side of the onramp. If it relates to the onramp it should be at least 50-100 metres back on the left to allow motorists to change their mind if they don't want to go on to the motorway. What on earth does it mean anyway, in the position it is? All I want is for Transit NZ to remove the sign, then I will make everyone happy by not turning left at the lights, because there will be no ambiguity."

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Regarding the closed 24-hour supermarket in the UK, a reader writes: "Hate to be a tedious bore, but English law still prevents large stores from opening for more than six hours between 10am and 6pm on a Sunday. Large stores are defined as those over 3000sq ft (279sq m). That includes most supermarkets."

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