Sideswipe: Teat-Bix and a latte

A cheeky little pit stop for a member of the government-funded Push Play 'keep active' campaign.

The top 10 celebrities Britons would like to bring back from the dead are:

1. Jesus.
2. Princess Diana.
3. William Shakespeare.
4. Albert Einstein.
5. Marilyn Monroe.
6. Leonardo da Vinci.
7. Elvis Presley.
8. Roald Dahl.
9. Freddie Mercury.
10. Martin Luther King.
(Source: The Telegraph.co.uk)

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How about this for service from the Waiheke ferry crew:

"I am a new Waiheke commuter and was on the ferry on Wednesday morning. As it came into Auckland they announced that a grey Mitsubishi in the $3 carpark had its headlights on. I knew immediately that it was mine! (My car is 25 years old so doesn't beep, flash or toot when you leave the lights on). What to do? My fellow passengers told me to talk to the guy (Daniel) who had made the announcement. The result was he took my keys and arranged for them to travel back to the island on the next ferry. Staff at Waiheke will then turn off my lights and hold my keys until I return this evening."

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Blair misses the point about the billboard warning road users to wear sunglasses, says Lou of Birkdale. "If someone needs signs to tell them the sun is bright, the road is slippery or a corner is ahead, they should not be driving. Likewise with double yellow lines, the road under discussion has one of the worst examples of the NZ Transport Agency's foolishness with these. More than a kilometre of yellow lines on a straight that Miss Daisy could overtake safely on. Other countries teach drivers to drive before they give them licences. Here, we give them a licence and then try to teach them to drive on the road."

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The Open Episcopal Church in Britain has come up with a novel way of extending its reach into the community by offering to send people communion wafers in the post. The "host in the post" service is designed to benefit those who would normally attend Eucharist but cannot do so because of age or ill-health. The postal wafer itself is free but there is a charge for postage and packaging - the postage for one wafer costs £2 ($5.20), while postage for 500 costs £10.

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View today's Herald cartoon

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