Sideswipe: Singing the apostrophe blues

Vincent of Mangere Bridge has noticed this billboard in a number of spots around Auckland.

"It shows how badly treated our language is becoming. The missing apostrophe from 'don't' renders it a word that doesn't even exist. I guess it goes to show that even the Auckland Blues bosses aren't that bright."

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Jasson Tredgett of Blockhouse Bay on the new Telecom ad:

"Instead of dropping Zoe Bell off the coast of Auckland in a shipping container to check if a call drops off, Telecom could have simply asked her to drive past the junction of Hillsborough Rd and Goodall St, which ironically is in sight of the cellphone tower. I'd also like to know how Zoe managed to open the container from the inside and get out and on to the roof without it sinking."

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A reader writes:

"When the city-state of Venice was a great trading port and centre of culture in the 13th and 14th century ships would arrive from all over the Med to do trade. Unfortunately, Europe and the Middle East suffered from outbreaks of the Black Plague. Ships arriving in Venice were required to 'park in the roads' or remain offshore for about 40 days to see if anyone on board developed symptoms of this terrible disease. About 40 days ... or in Italian 'quarantina giorni'. This is where we get our English word, quarantine."

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Typos Are Bad For Business:

1. This year, a cereal company in Oregon had to place a rush order for new packaging for its Peace Cereal. A typo in its 0800 number, printed on the box, sent callers to a phone sex line instead. They were greeted by a recorded voice asking, "Do you love sex?"

2. In 2006, Italian airline Alitalia listed a business-class fare from Toronto to Cyprus for $39 instead of the usual $3900. Someone at farecompare.com posted the news online and starting a buying stampede that lasted until the fare was corrected. Alitalia initially tried to cancel the already issued tickets, but eventually relented and about 2000 people flew to Cyprus for under $200.

3. In 1931, a chemistry editor at Merriam-Webster sent an internal communication to the printers that included the phrase "D or d, cont./density." The intention was to add "density" to the existing list of words that the letter "D" can abbreviate. The printer misunderstood, and instead printed a single, run-together word: dord, meaning density. The typo appeared in the dictionary for five years before it was noticed.
(Source: MentalFloss.com)

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Heather Mills has been so busy spending Paul McCartney's money she doesn't know who Susan Boyle is. Mills asked on Twitter what all the fuss was about. "Sorry, who is Susan Boyle, no disrespect intended?" she wrote in a Tweet last week. "Wow, what a great voice Susan Boyle has," she wrote after hearing Boyle sing. "Wish I had time to watch telly. Too much travelling. I just watch DVD box sets."

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Hell is other people:

I once had a flatmate who would write his name on all food items, including each individual egg, and didn't want his flatmates to use his new lounge suite (yes, it was in the lounge) ... but that was nothing compared with the disoriented drunk who once relieved himself in my wardrobe ... on my brand new shoes. What's your flatmate from hell story?

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View today's Herald cartoon

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Today's Webpick: If you think you can drive and yap on your cell phone at the same time, take this online test. Watch ithere.

Follow Ana Samways on Twitter here.