Sideswipe: Pull the other one

Following this week's 'turn knob' sign, here's more unnecessary signage, this time from a KFC on Auckland's North Shore, snapped by Andrew Blackler. Photo / Supplied

Quit your sponging

A budget-conscious council in Austria has requested that swimmers stop swallowing water in a bid to save money. According to a survey carried out by managers at Vienna's 18 public swimming pools, swimmers are drinking 5000 litres of chlorinated pool water a day.

An official pointed out that, as well as replacing water, authorities had to spend €24 ($42) on chlorine - €1.3 a pool. The council is also targeting people who wear Bermuda shorts to go bathing. Tests revealed that the average wearer takes 2.5 litres of water with them trapped in their swimwear every time they get out of the pool.

The official said: "That means that for every 1000 visits to the pool we lose 2500 litres of water." (Source: telegraph.co.uk)

Fangs very much

Dentists in the US say they are dealing with a surge in young patients who want temporary vampire-style fangs installed. Twilight fans are paying about US$200 ($277) for the "vampire veneers" - an aesthetic enhancement of the canines, making them longer and sharper. (Source: newslite.tv)

Butt surely they're joking

"We have tried encouraging councils and government departments to install butt litter receptacles at locations for their staff and customers," writes Simon Johnston from Smokin Station.

"However, through the anti-smoking organisations funded by government, they have researched that by installing butt litter bins to stop butts being littered (as shown in your photo yesterday) there is apparently a very good chance that non-smokers will see these butt receptacles and be encouraged to commence smoking immediately. The lobbyists would prefer this litter to be seen, to put people off smoking. This is the latest excuse used by councils. It used to be budget."

The truth bubbles to the surface

So David bought a bottle of wine in England called "Kiwi Cuvee", which was made in France. He wonders why the French are allowed to use "Kiwi" when we aren't allowed to use "champagne". A quick google reveals the creators are Kiwis living in France.