There were a few glitches at this year's New Zealand music awards, like when the revolving stage stopped after Elemeno P's set. Like when Tui hosts Oliver Driver and Jaquie Brown had to pad like crazy with spontaneous talent quests and quizzes involving audience members to allow for the technical gremlins to be escorted off.
And like when the Aotea Centre fire alarm sounded just as the after-party was getting into full swing.
Though it took a while for the industry crowd to take notice of the signal, possibly mistaking that electric hooter for a minimalist Concord Dawn remix, the party DJ had cued at the wrong speed.
Everyone eventually evacuated into the square for 20 minutes, where funnily enough they were at more risk of smoke inhalation from the music industry's sturdy contingent of gaspers than anything that might have been smouldering indoors.
It was a false alarm and the rush back to the bar when the all-clear was given certainly beat the evacuation time by some minutes.
Earlier though, it was a fast-moving affair. Prime Minister Helen Clark got through her spontaneous speech Isn't Kiwi Music Doing Well Under My Labour Government and dished out three awards in the same time guests had figured how to finally get the tops off the beverages in the goodie bags.
One of them was the Best Gospel/Christian album won by Julia Grace who, oddly enough didn't thank the man upstairs. Though Dave Dobbyn made up for that later in a pre-recorded video acceptance for his Best Solo Male Tui - his 15th NZ Music award apparently - from out on the road with Th'Dudes.
Considering her famous toilet bowl comment, some might have detected irony in Boh Runga announcing that the best selling single award winner was last year's NZ Idol Rosita Vai, who missed the event.
Best acceptance speech went to Pluto's Tim Arnold who concluded his band's thank yous for the New Zealand Herald Single of the Year with: "And I'd just like to say thanks to my dealer. Thanks for all the great crack."
As for the presenters, the funniest was Oscar Kightley with his cousin Scribe as runner-up.
Deadpanned the rapper after seeing a clip of a certain Dobbyn hit which also featured prominently at the 2005 awards: "Welcome Home, I love that song. It reminds me of the big finale last year when Dave Dobbyn was singing that song and that guy from Al Qaeda came out and sang it with him."
But Sione's Wedding writer and star Kightley had some good advice for those going home empty handed.
'It's quite funny that we've been asked to come and present because we were nominated for 10 [New Zealand film] awards and we didn't win any. I just want to say, if your name is not read out tonight that the feelings of bitterness will hang around for a while. There will be a short time where you will be anti-awards shows and you'll think that they don't mean anything. But after a while the bitterness turns into a warm friend that just tells you you were robbed. But your self esteem will come back and you will be able to work again."
<i>Sideswipe:</i> Music Awards Special
Opinion
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