Sideswipe: For pasty gents only

Sarah says her husband discovered this tiny tube of toothpaste in the business-class freebies.

After half-dying from what must have been swine flu, a reader rang a Government-funded health line. "Late at night, no answer. Rang again at 6am, no answer. Same at 7am. At 8am someone picks up ... 15 minutes of her telling me how amazing their treatment plan was going to be once we completed the triage questions ... the second of which was, 'Do you think you are pregnant?' Being male, I didn't think that was too likely. After a further 15 minutes the answer came in ... 'it says, go to the doctor'. "

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The sign on the door said: Please be aware of your feet and step back as you open the door. "When I first saw this sign at work, I thought it was a joke," writes a reader. "I checked and it really wasn't a joke, it is on the stairwell doors on every level. Apparently I really do work with people who don't know to step out of the way of an opening door. This has been displayed for more than two years, so I guess they can't learn to do it and they must be constantly reminded."

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Macleans College in Bucklands Beach, Manukau City, also has strict rules for girls. "Earrings must be in the lobes only," writes a reader, "and lip-moisturising Blistex or ChapStick may be mistaken as lip gloss and therefore qualify as illicit wearing of 'makeup'."

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Speaking of ridiculous school rules, another reader says: "I went to a school in southeast Auckland where we were not allowed to walk on the grass, eat in our school uniform outside school grounds and had to stay one metre between boys and girls at all time. My friends who did not go to the same school still make fun of me for not being able to walk on grass, even though I have not been at school for years."

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Socks up, shirts tucked, hair length, no jewellery and clean shoes are reasonable expectations, but most students who have written in think the worst rule is no singlets allowed. "At Auckland Grammar," says a student, "you are not allowed singlets no matter what colour, no matter if they're visible or not and no matter how cold." Another reader says it's the same deal at Mt Roskill Grammar: "The deputy principals walk into different classrooms during the day to check students for hidden singlets. What a waste of resources. I know of at least one staff member who asks students to undo the top button on their shirts to check to see if they are wearing anything underneath."

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But this King's student likes his school's rules. "Since my grandfather has been there the rules have not changed. They may be old fashioned, yet they make us look presentable and neat. The rules also teach us to be courteous and to respect our elders and not many other schools do this ... It is quite obvious this method works as King's has produced many fine students in the past and will do so for many years to come."

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Customers wanting to make a cash withdrawal in one Serbian city risked feeling the squeeze instead. Police in the southern city of Nis say they found a 2m python sprawled over a cash machine in the town. Rescue unit commander Nenad Ristic said firefighters used a shovel and a bag to capture the snake. No one has claimed ownership of the python, which is thought to be an escaped pet.

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View today's Herald cartoon

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Today's Webpick: The 'don't text and drive' message is being hammered into teens in the UK with this film being shown in schools. Would it work here? Be warned, some content may disturb. Go here.

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