Sideswipe: Curious branding

A reader in Vancouver, needing milk, found this brand ... "Homo Milk. Really?" he joked. Photo / Supplied

Facebook can be a discrete way of being a voyeur - or really, really annoying - depending on how you use it. "How to Suck at Facebook", says theoatmeal.com, sums up the different Facebook personalities you're bound to recognise instantly...

The Gamer: invites you to join Farmville/Mafia Wars and constantly updates you on their progress.

The Event Co-ordinator: invites all to everything.

The Desperate Marketer: spams their friends with "become a fan of [whatever]" requests.

The Horrible Photo Tagger: tags you with anything, suitable or not, for family or co-workers to see.

The Rash: follows you around Facebook and comments on everything you do.

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Yesterday Scott stopped at Wendy's for a quick lunch and overheard the following mother-daughter exchange. The mother (late 40s) was talking about having a salad. The daughter (around 20) was obviously horrified and was saying, "You can't come for a salad, you have to have a burger." The discussion continued and peaked when the daughter said, "You don't understand ... You don't go to a prostitute and ask for a hug."

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For the past 50 years a couple have unwittingly used a rare £500,000 ($1.14 million) Chinese vase as an umbrella stand. The pair from Dorset had no idea it was rare and valuable until it was spotted in their spare bedroom by a visiting antiques expert. The design of the 47cm "lantern" vase suggested it was made during China's golden era of porcelain production, possibly for Emperor Qianlong, around 1740. (Source: Newslite.tv)

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Keith Walker reckons it's a fiction that speedometers are calibrated 5-10km/h too slow. "Frequently we have a radar set near one of our local schools which shows your speed on a large screen. For every car I have owned, and for those of everyone I know, the speedometer is accurate."

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Emily writes: "On Friday evening I was driving down Summer St, Ponsonby, at about 9pm. I accidentally took out the wing mirror of a parked silver car. I couldn't stop because I had my tired and crying baby daughter in the back, who was desperately in need of her bed. I feel terrible about it! Please contact Sideswipe for my contact details."

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Can't please all of the people, all of the time: "The average reader of this column must be 75," declares Jeanna. "Get some young people's stories in there." And on the same day, Len writes: "I couldn't make head nor tail of the Facebook story or the text-speak from the Trade Me auction the day before. Please remember you have readers (I am 77) who don't spend their lives in front of a screen or a mobile phone."