Paul Holmes: City divided by a letter

Whanganui. We now have a city divided by an alphabetical letter. If the Geographic Board has its way, it is to be Whanganui, not Wanganui. The final decision rests with the Land Information Minister, Maurice Williamson, and who knows what Maurice will do? It will be a tricky one for Maurice. A recent referendum had 77 per cent of those who voted wanting retention of the status quo. But the submissions to the Geographic Board were pretty even with a slight majority for retention of the status quo. The board decided that Maori had a genuine, evidenced case.

By the way, I noted that Don Grant, the board chairman, said it had 444 submissions wanting Wanganui and 436 wanting Whanganui and nine neutral submissions. Neutral? Why would anyone make a submission if they were neutral. What use is a neutral submission? So now we know. Even wishy-washy people make submissions. Some people can't express an opinion even in a submission.

But Michael Laws, Whanganui's Mayor, is incensed. On his radio programme when the decision was announced, Michael went off. Michael likes to go off and has reinvented himself on his radio show by doing a very good line in going off. Down in the glade a little while ago while watching the planting of the little natives I heard him go off because the men doing the planting had his programme on very loudly in the ute, listening while they worked. One thing about Michael, he's not afraid to go off. People expect their radio talkback personalities to have and voice strong opinions. Once the talkback host expresses a clear set of opinions, he starts to get only callers who agree with his set of opinions. It makes the game nice and safe. So Michael went well and truly off. (By the way, Michael, what is the "h" doing in your name?)

For the life of me I cannot understand his position. And I cannot understand the passion the argument has caused in Whanganui or Wanganui or whatever the place is called now. It is an "h", for goodness sake. It is not even an odd letter, like an "x" or a "z" or a "q". It is only four points in Scrabble. It is not loud either, an "h". It is not offensive. It does not come out of a mouth and roar at you. Some people, those less educated, are prone to drop it anyway when it comes along. As in, "'Ello guvner! Goin' 'ome?"

When an "h" follows a "w", it makes damn all difference to the pronunciation of a word. Whanganui will remain Wanganui to most people. It's not as if the Geographic Board has recommended they change the city's name to Honolulu or Harare. It is one gentle, aspirated letter, one letter that already exists in the name of the river and which already exists in the name of the District Health Board in Whanganui or Wanganui or whatever we call the damned place now.

In any case, Tariana Turia likes what the Geographic Board has recommended. Mrs Turia, co-leader of the Maori Party, pronounced herself distinctly moved by the decision. She said the people of Whanganui have been patient in righting the wrongs of the past. She says it "confirms the wisdom of my tupuna, of my whakapapa, of the river, of the people". I take Mrs Turia's side, not only because I respect her but because I would never like to be on the other side of an argument with her. Mind you, I don't know what wisdom a river has but presumably this particular river is wise because it already has the "h" in it. But to Mrs Turia, the board's recommendation obviously means a lot and she sees it as a genuine righting of a wrong. Mind you, what was so terribly wrong about taking the "h" out of a word is beyond me. It is not something I would fight about.

But for Michael Laws, the change is about a failure to respect his culture, his people, his history, his whakapapa. Well, Michael it is an "h". It is an "h" that used to be there, got taken away and is now going to be put back, if Maurice Williamson agrees. And I don't think Maurice will be going out of his way to upset the co-leader of the coalition partner.