KEY POINTS:
I Lost my ethnicity on the first week I arrived in New Zealand. The boss' secretary at the travel company where I worked was completing a survey form. One question asked about the ethnic diversity at the workplace, and she asked me what my race was.
"Chinese," I said. "Wrong answer," she said.
"But that's what I am. I even have a birth certificate and Singapore identification card to prove it."
"Nope," she said. I had only two choices - Asian or Others.
I argued that Asian is not an ethnicity, and neither is Others.
"Welcome to New Zealand," she said. On that note, I was no longer Chinese but an ethnic Asian.
That day I also found that it really didn't matter that Singaporeans, Thais, Koreans and Japanese were as different as sushi to fish and chips. To many New Zealanders, we are one and the same.
A fax came in from Korea at the office, with a note asking for me to translate it.
An inquiry in Japanese arrived and I was asked if I could draft a reply.
A friend asked me once if I thought such actions were racist. I honestly don't think they are, rather they stem from ignorance - along with racial stereotyping.
Ten years on, New Zealand has witnessed a surge in immigration and increased diversity.
But how much has changed?
Filling out an enrolment form for my 5-year-old daughter who started school recently, I found we had progressed from being just Asian to Other Asian.
Chinese was now recognised as an ethnicity - but mainly for those born in mainland China, we were told.
Ignorance about people and ethnicities in New Zealand still abounds.
Last month, when making a call to an advertising agency for iBall, I was told by a rep that she had already helped her client capture the Asian market by advertising in a Chinese language newspaper, so there was no need to consider any other Asian media.
Put into a European context, that's like saying she already helped her client reach the entire European market by placing an advertisement in French.
More than half the Chinese people born outside China cannot communicate in Mandarin.
Last Friday the Human Rights Commission released its report card on the state of race relations in New Zealand.
Race Relations Commissioner Joris de Bres said that in 2006 things were looking bright. There was increased ethnic and religious diversity, the public mood on race relations was more settled, there was peace at Waitangi and a reduced number of complaints about discrimination. He was optimistic things were getting better.
But it really depends on how you read the report.
For example, de Bres cited the increasing growth in Maori, Pacific and Asian media as positive.
I see this more as a continuing sign of ethnic minorities being sidelined by mainstream media.
There would not be a need for newspapers, radio and television stations catering to almost every ethnic minority group if mainstream media had catered to their reading and viewing needs in the first place.
Often, media for ethic minorities may not be the first choice of business for individuals; sometimes they were unable to find employment in the mainstream media, myself included.
De Bres also viewed the trend of increased celebration of multicultural events as helping people understand other cultures. Does it really?
I think celebrating diversity in the way we do - ethnic minorities wearing their ethnic costumes and performing cultural dances - could do more harm than good.
It does not reflect the natural, day-to-day setting in which people of different races live and interact.
When the unique cultural practices of each ethnic minority are emphasised, the focus is too much on our differences, rather than what different ethnic groups have in common.
This adds to the distance between mainstream New Zealanders and the others, and also accentuates racial stereotyping.
I don't think the biggest problem here is racism but rather ignorance.
What needs improving is race relations on an individual people-to-people level, which I think is New Zealand's weakest link when it comes to race relations.
When I was in the Boy Scouts I took part in a programme called "walk a day in another boy's culture".
I had to spend 24 hours with a friend from another culture and do everything he did.
It was the month of Ramadan, so I spent it at the home of a Muslim friend. I walked and talked with him, fasted with him and eventually broke the fasting and had dinner with him and his family.
That 24 hours helped me to understand how Muslims feel during their fasting month and their commitment to the Islamic faith more than all the cultural events I've attended put together.
Perhaps de Bres might want to consider introducing such a programme for Race Relations Day.
