KEY POINTS:
For most of us, the most precious thing we have is time. It's a paradox that the invention of so many labour-saving devices means that so many of us feel there are too few hours in the day, but there it is.
If I was asked what I'd like more of, my answer would be time - time to spend doing what I want with the people I like.
And I probably will be asked that. We're one of the households participating in one of the endless bloody surveys that Statistics New Zealand initiates.
I'm not sure which one it is - a well-spoken chap just appeared on our doorstep one day and told us he was here to conduct a survey.
When I told him that wouldn't be convenient, he said we had already agreed to participate, and besides, we were required by law to answer the questions.
No one in our house could remember agreeing to such a survey, which is not to say we didn't. This is a very disorganised family.
As the interminable questions went on, and on, and on, my answers became more truculent and terse. I found myself stewing in my chair, festering at being made to do something I didn't want to do.
The whole point of being older is that you reach a stage where you can say no. And I certainly thought that reaching the age of 42, becoming a home owner, holding down a responsible job, paying my taxes and in general being a good citizen would have meant that I didn't have to have government officials in my home against my will. I didn't want to sit there and answer questions about my employment and my income for half a bloody hour.
There were 10 million other ways I could have spent half an hour - and none of them involved a Statistics New Zealand information gatherer, nice and all as he was.
And that was the other thing: I felt resentful that I was being rude. I wanted to be nice, but I just couldn't bring myself to offer him the degree of hospitality I would normally show a guest. But then I guess he wasn't a guest. He'd come to our home and told us that we had to answer his questions or we'd be fined. And judging from the callers I had to my radio show, it's the coercive factor that most people find so off-putting about this information gathering.
In fairness to Statistics New Zealand, it probably wouldn't get many takers if it pleaded to our better natures, especially when it comes to some of the longitudinal surveys. Some poor people have had a Statistics New Zealand person in their lives for 10 years. Ten years!
Every quarter, they have to deliver information about their business to the department, and all the pleading, begging, weeping and flat-out refusals to co-operate have come to nought.
One woman told me she had fought for years, but in the end, she says, they broke her. Now she coughs up every last detail about staff and sick leave and levies like a lamb. Not a murmur from her.
She has my heartfelt sympathy.
Maybe if they offered a sweetener... Instead of just wielding the big old $500 fine stick, try using a carrot, as well. Supply an office temp to businesses for a couple of hours every quarter in recognition of the time employers take to prepare the information.
Hand over a voucher for a couple of movie passes to the participants in household surveys. I don't know - just a gesture to show the Government appreciates that New Zealanders are giving up their precious time to answer intrusive and personal questions. And to what end?
If I truly thought that New Zealand was going to be a better society all round because of my participation, perhaps it would make my answers less grudging.
But I seriously doubt that this information is going to be put to any tangible use.
I understand the need to plan for the future and that a country needs to know the age bands of its population to plan for schools and hospitals - but surely that essential fact-gathering is covered by the Census.
All this other stuff just seems designed to create jobs and research projects for university students.
Did you know, for instance, that in 2001, almost one third of sculptors and painters lived in the South Island, compared to 25 per cent of all employed people? Fascinating and a factoid to delight and amaze your dinner-party guests, but vital to the wellbeing of New Zealand? I don't think so.
If you haven't been marked out by Statistics New Zealand yet, it's only a matter of time. There are so many surveys - with more to come.
A social wellbeing survey is planned for this year or next. Eight thousand people will be asked questions in 45-minute interviews that will help Statistics New Zealand to determine their happiness.
Judging from the reaction most people have to taking part in these surveys, I can predict that the result will be that we're a nation of very grumpy people. Stop asking us questions - then we'll be happy.
