Diane Robertson: Angels at Auckland's table help families survive

The kindness shown by City Mission volunteers touches many lives. Photo / Brett Phibbs

Opinion

There are angels around Auckland.

Tens of thousands of them. They're the people who donate time, money, food, clothing, furniture and Christmas gifts to bring some hope into the difficult lives of our most vulnerable neighbours.

Individual donors rarely get to see the difference they make. In a city the size of Auckland, it is easy to live and work almost entirely within your own socio-economic group. But the difference individual donations make for the City Mission's clients is real. It is the difference between a family having food to put on the table or going hungry. It is the difference between going to the doctor or putting up with ill-health. It is the difference between feeling like a part of your community, or feeling isolated.

I know from personal experience what a difference a little bit of extra support can make to a family that is struggling.

I grew up in small-town New Zealand in the 1950s. My family was at the bottom of the social and economic ladder. As I grew older, I became increasingly aware of the gap between us and nearly every one else in the town. By the time I was a teenager, I realised that our family was one of our town's charity cases. It was humiliating. But it was made less humiliating by the unobtrusive kindness of our neighbours.

They were the angels in our lives, and decades on, the grace of their actions still touches me.

Fresh fruit and vegetables arrived on the doorstep and it was made clear that we would be doing our neighbours a favour by accepting an excess of produce that would otherwise go to waste. New knitted jerseys were pressed on us - "I just had some wool I needed to use up - would this be of any use to you?" School uniforms and clothes that had been "grown out of" always seemed to turn up in time, just as you were growing out of the last lot of hand-me-downs.

The local grocer gave us food on credit for as long as he could, and the doctor tended our family without payment. At school, everyone got the half-pint of sun-warmed milk provided by the government. For a select few of us, somehow, someone made sure that our milk was provided with sandwiches.

I've never forgotten the shame I felt - but I've also never forgotten the kindness I experienced. It continues to inspire me.

What you learn at the Mission is how people's lives can spin out of control. A job loss leads to a default on a loan which creates financial stress, which leads to the electricity being cut off, the car being repossessed and, if you are really unlucky, eviction from your home. Tension and despair lead to violence. Addictions slowly erode your relationships with family and friends, your capacity to support yourself and, finally, your self-respect. Mental illness means you just can't get it together. It's bad for you - but it's worse for your children.

So when support is put in place to deal with the big issues of housing, healthcare, debt management and income support, we also make sure that the small things are addressed. That children are able to get clothes when they need them. That they get a present at Christmas. That they have a place to come for Christmas dinner where, for a few hours, the pressures of day-to-day life are put behind them and they can see the possibility of a different future. That's the difference that you, our Auckland angels, help us make.

Thank you - and Merry Christmas.

Diane Robertson is the Auckland City Missioner.