Dialogue: Instantly we're in a now generation

By SANDY BURGHAM

My 5-year-old daughter left her bangle at her aunt's place. As can be imagined, this escalated into a catastrophe and getting the bangle back became the central focus of her life.

It seemed she couldn't wait a few days for the next visit to her aunt's, demanding that we make a special trip to rescue the $3.50 jewellery item.

Crack of dawn the following day she rang her aunty, got her out of bed and demanded its return.

"Don't worry, it's here, quite safe," she was reassured.

"But I need it," my daughter insisted. "Can't you just send it to me over the internet?"

Has she inherited her mother's impatience or is she simply a product of a culture characterised by I need it now-ness?

We live in a problem-solution society in which letting things work out naturally just isn't an option.

Oh yes, I know we are supposed to be going with the flow, seeing what eventuates, all the while stopping to smell the roses, but we are no longer working to that sort of timeframe.

Since everything can be done at breakneck speed, we step up the urgency. We are one-minute managers, eating two-minute noodles, making a mockery of the three minutes it takes to boil an egg.

On television we want news updates, and food in a minute, preferably cooked by microwave. The networks can't even run the credits to a show without simultaneously promoting what's on tomorrow.

But while we have willingly sold our souls to technology, in the process we have forgone some of the mainstays of our values system.

It's almost outrageous that we tolerate call-waiting beep signals on the telephone, an excuse to rudely carry on two conversations at once or, indeed, indicate to the other person that someone more interesting may be trying to get through.

For so long we have boasted of our goal of having a computer in every classroom, yet we have a growing issue of illiteracy.

I have always wondered why we should bother with computers in classrooms. What's the hurry? Can't kids just learn how to use them later on in life? What's next? Video clock-setting lessons?

Meanwhile, children who daily pit their agility and wits against home electronic gaming systems don't have to wait until their skill levels sharpen up to clock the game. They can easily visit websites with cheating details posted by other kids telling them how to short-cut experience and beat the machine.

Another factor which confuses some of our fundamental values is week-blending and the blurring between work and play time.

While I couldn't function without Saturday and Sunday shopping, I fear that it has inadvertently ruined our quality of life. At least in the days when nothing was open we were forced to spend time with our families and take a break over the weekend.

These days taking a sabbatical has resorted to snatched minutes here and there, referred to as "time out". And now, buying stuff has become a legitimate weekend pastime.

Service-industry efficiencies have made us bone lazy. How many times have you been stuck in a fast-food drive-through thinking it would have been quicker just to park the car, go to the counter, order the meal and sit down to eat it?

My friend got into a fast-food fight with the management because the chicken burger she ordered was going to take a few extra minutes, and she refused to drive out of the busy drive-through and park the car since it would defeat the whole purpose.

We are living in a strained culture that works against the natural ebb and flow of life. These days we don't have the patience to ride out the storms, wait until children learn things in their own time, and generally wait and see. This is all to the detriment of the bigger picture.

My octogenarian uncle rings me often using his old-fashioned phone - you know, the non-portable type that sits on a telephone table.

When we talk I am always on the portable phone, simultaneously unloading the dishwasher, making beds, clearing out handbags and other earth-shattering stuff.

While as a multitasking female I can easily handle many jobs while carrying on a valid conversation, it always strikes me that my uncle is giving me his undivided attention.

He has planned the call, relaxed into a chair, slowly dialled the number (he doesn't even push buttons!) and focuses only on our conversation.

Is he just being a laggard or is he a true example of someone who is really living his life? He's 84 and it's no wonder he is still going strong.