Deborah Coddington: Pigs in the trough should learn to muck in to real life

Chris Carter clocked up a $1080 bill for one night in a hotel. Photo / Mark Mitchell

What is it about men who excuse bad behaviour with the line they're just red-blooded?

Labour MP Shane Jones, paler than a newly peeled egg, explained away the nights spent booking porn movies on his ministerial credit card that he was just a red-blooded dude.

Then there was former mayoral candidate Pat Norris, who admitted secretly filming his tenant making love to another man. He said he felt obliged to expose her affair and any other "red-blooded male" would have done the same.

Oh what a fortnight of shame. Same trough, different snouts. A massage here, a spa there, designer suits, golf clubs, kids' toys, coffee breaks, lobster dinners, taxi rides, a full-length mirror, swanky hotels, limousines, single malts, "a bottle of Bollie garcon, tout de suite".

Jim Anderton airily claimed it was "just silly" to take different cards to pay "for this on one and that on another", after he was caught charging $620 for spas. In the real world, Jim, where we file tax returns, that is exactly what we do.

Personal expenditure goes on one card; business on another and IRD comes down on us like, well, like the IRD if we start telling the inspectors they are "just silly".

Chris Carter, who has long behaved as if Mary Magdalene herself anointed his feet with perfume then dried his toes with her hair, fell from grace with a resounding shriek. When his "you're just picking on me because I look like a luxury-loving gay boy" didn't work, he threatened to quit.

An unhealthy number of old Labour stalwarts queued hold the lift. Loyal to their party's roots, they simply couldn't stomach items like Carter's $1080 hotel bill for one night, picked up by the public after Stuff dumped the credit card statements on their website.

Why $1080? Carter was not alone that night (his companion's name was blanked out) but because they checked out late, an additional night was charged.

It's this charge-it-Marge mentality, infecting not just MPs like Carter, Jones, Mita Ririnui, Anderton, and Rick Barker, but also Manukau Mayor Len Brown which proves these troughers are not fit to serve the public.

They should quit, get a real job and be responsible for their own finances and tax returns. They pass laws and make decisions which affect all in business but have no idea of the daily struggles of those businesses.

Every time Brown put a coffee on his credit card, the coffee shop was charged commission, and possibly merchant fees, by the card company. Because he's mayor, they probably don't like to refuse him.

Another sharp-eyed Brown-watcher spotted the $810 dinner at Volare restaurant on a Sunday night in September last year occurred just days before his birthday. Happy coincidence or happy birthday?

Now Brown says it wasn't his fault, he was too much "out there". Sorry's not good enough from this serial offender and big spender, who was repeatedly warned. He shouldn't be in office. He's not a lawyer. He has a law degree - there's a big difference.

Why can't politicians treat public money as if it's their own? Tim Groser has legs - he should walk down to the bar if he must have a drink. We stay in hotels, if we have a late flight our bags go in storage and we walk the day away - Carter can do the same.

We frequently do long-haul flights to nice hotels which offer gorgeous temptations. I too, check in tired and hot and think a spa and massage would be nice. But at $630 I think it would not be nice.

Call me abstemious, but we don't waste money on rip-offs like mini-bar drinks, snacks, spas, massages, and half-days. I bet we're the same as anyone who knows what it's like to worry about the mortgage, and next week's income.

Guilty politicians won't change. They're inoculated with greed and a sense of entitlement.

But remember, they are a minority. MPs not making headlines right now are honest and frugal. They don't all rip us off; some serve us well. We owe it to the good to vote out the bad.

deb.coddington@xtra.co.nz