Why doesn't the Ministry of Women's Affairs chuck $3 million of taxpayers' money at Wift so it can bid for the rights to screen the Rugby World Cup?
Never heard of Wift? Women in Film and Television, formed in 1993 to raise the profile of women in New Zealand film and television.
Then when we all grizzle about the unfairness of this, members can call us sexist.
That's about the same level of debate engaged in by Maori Party MP Te Ururoa Flavell when he labelled as racist anyone who criticised Te Puni Kokiri's $3 million funding of Maori Television's bid for the Rugby World Cup rights.
There's no surer way to shut down discussion than to pull out the race card.
However, I don't doubt there would be way more outrage at my original hypothesis - a bunch of women-only broadcasters given public funding to screen a two-year package leading up to the Cup.
Maori Party co-leader Pita Sharples justifies the money by saying it will encourage viewers to use Maori words and phrases in everyday life, and "celebrate the contribution Maori make to New Zealand's economy, society, culture and arts".
I don't dispute that, but once more it is only Maori at the top who will benefit. What about those at the bottom?
In the same week, an almost ignored report has been published from academics, including Otago University's highly esteemed Professor David Fergusson, he of the longitudinal Christchurch study of 1200 children starting from their births in 1977. (tinyurl.com/ye2qztm)
This latest report focused on "ethnic identity and exposure to childhood maltreatment" and surveyed the cohort's 114 Maori children.
First, the good news, which may come as a huge surprise to many. If you are Maori, you are less likely than non-Maori to be sexually abused.
The report states: "Being of sole Maori identity may be a factor that reduces risks of exposure to childhood sexual abuse."
But the shocking conclusion is that Maori, and in particular those of sole Maori cultural identity, were at "higher risk of exposure to physical punishment and inter-parental violence", and that this could not be fully explained by either socio-economic deprivation or exposure to family dysfunction in childhood.
Many of us suspected that this was so, from the names and faces that appear with sickening repetition in our courts, but why is this relevant to the Rugby World Cup?
Because Te Puni Kokiri is charged with "striving for Maori to enjoy a better quality of life". Maori succeeding as Maori - does that mean broadcasting rugby?
If everything Maori in this land was hunky dory, then they wouldn't need their own government department, and a patronising one at that, with a mission statement written as if Maori are little children, not the tangata whenua.
In the latest Listener magazine, Ruth Laugesen interviews Fergusson - and his critics - about this research, and they all have valid comments. Professor Mason Durie says causes of violence are multi-faceted and addressing the problems must be similarly diverse.
Maori child advocacy director Anton Blank, one of the people who did something after the death of Nia Glassie, talks of teaching parents through tikanga that children are essentially "godly and perfect" rather than essentially sinful.
I bet these programmes wouldn't turn their noses up at a few thousand dollars, let alone $3 million.
Bidding for screening rights is not a smart business move by Maori Television when it needs a $3 million government hand-out. Supporters shouldn't accuse critics of presuming Maori don't understand high finance. Rodney Hide is right - taxpayers' money shouldn't be going into broadcasting the Rugby World Cup, whether the broadcaster is TVNZ, TV3, Sky, or Maori TV.
If John Key doesn't watch out, he'll be hijacked by his coalition partners. Already, every important issue evolves into a horse-trade.
What does the country really know about emissions trading, sentencing and parole reviews, the foreshore and seabed, other than how Key solved a spat between Act and the Maori Party?
If the Labour Government gave Maori Television $3 million for rugby, a National opposition would be into Parekura Horomia like robbers' dogs. All Prime Minister Key can manage is "it's not helpful".
<i>Deborah Coddington</i>: Agency misguided over Cup rights pledge
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