Herald on Sunday editorial: Paying to get babies to sleep at night

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Few problems in life are more common or stressful than a baby crying several times a night. That so many have experienced the stress is no comfort to parents at their wits' end. It is a lonely, tiring ordeal in the dark. Every night of broken sleep leaves parents more tired and feeling less capable of coping. They need help.

Our Insight feature today describes a new industry of help offered by people who style themselves as sleep consultants. They have not been welcomed by long-established voluntary agencies such as Parents Centre.

It warns its members to be wary of sleep consultants, mainly, it seems, because they encourage parents to train a baby to sleep through the night.

This can involve the baby crying itself back to sleep, a method at odds with the modern philosophy of empathy and engagement with children at all times. If that is the prevailing advice of midwives, Plunket and other health professionals it is no wonder parents are turning to alternative consultants.

As one of them said, "Simply telling parents that night wake-ups are normal for 12 months is not helpful, supportive or empathetic."

Not for the tired parents, certainly, and not for the baby if the pressure on the parent becomes upsetting for them both.

Sleep consulting, we report, has become a big business. That means many parents are willing to pay considerable sums for a service they can get free through the public health system.

The dean of the Otago University school of medicine thinks they are wasting their money. "Treating sleep disorders is not complicated and should be within the reach of a Plunket nurse," he said. Parents can ring PlunketLine at any time of night and speak to a nurse and many do. A clinical adviser says sleep is one of the 10 most common reasons people call.

But with free advice readily available, the willingness of parents to pay for different advice speaks for itself. They think they are getting more useful guidance from consultants who have done a quick course in sleep training, often to help themselves cope with a wakeful baby. As always in health matters, there is concern that harm may be done by an unregulated service.

But if the possible harm is that the baby may go back to sleep not feeling secure but simply shutting down because no one is responding, stressed parents might conclude worse things can happen.

They are not taking the easy way out. Listening to your baby cry can be harder than attending to it. It is called tough love. It may be unfashionable but the sums parents are shelling out for babies' sleep training suggests it works.