Guys' book tells the inside story

Bryan and Jo Guy learned there was no point wishing Scott was back.

Bryan and Jo Guy are about to bare their souls over the murder of their farmer son Scott, with the release this week of a heartfelt book.

Scott Guy: His Parents' Story of Love, Betrayal, Murder and Courage will be launched on Friday in a book shop in the Guys' hometown of Feilding.

The book includes excerpts from Jo's diary and describes how the couple survived the stress, grief and intense public interest following the gunning down of Scott in July 2010.

Bryan Guy told the Herald on Sunday he found giving advice to people going through similar tragedies difficult, but he shared a few tips. "Focus on the future rather than what you have lost. Focus on what you still have. Being grateful for what you've still got is part of managing."

He and Jo had learned there was no point wishing they could bring Scott back - there was nothing they could do to alter the fact he was gone.

"You've got to choose to be thankful. Choose to let other people be close to you. You've got to be open to other people wanting to ... help and open and accepting of advice."

For the Guys, the writing process had been cathartic. "We didn't start it with that in mind but there's no doubt about it, with writing you need to look at what you've learned and what you've been through."

Author Tony Farrington said working on the book - about how the couple dealt with the "horror of their lives" - had been riveting and inspiring. "They did the book to pass on what they've learned from their tragedies to other people so that it might help them when they're facing difficulties themselves."

Farrington approached the couple a year ago after seeing them interviewed on television.

"They just blew me away with the total acceptance of the circumstances in which they found themselves; the lack of bitterness, anger or vengeance. It was their attitude that made me think there's more to these people than we've seen."

Feilding was chosen for the launch as a way of thanking residents for their huge support following Scott's murder, and the trial and acquittal of the Guys' son-in-law, Ewen Macdonald.

That support ranged from the local supermarket allowing them to shop after hours because the publicity and interest in them made it impossible to go out without being stopped by people wanting to talk, to the school taking steps to make sure their grandchildren - the children of daughter Anna and Macdonald, now her ex-husband - weren't made to feel any different.

Church groups prayed for them, people delivered food, others helped keep the family farm going.

"It was absolutely remarkable support," Farrington said. "They wanted the book launched in Feilding, where the local community has been so good to them."