Gillian Millane, mother of British backpacker Grace Millane murdered in New Zealand, breaks her silence over daughter’s death

Gillian Millane, mother of British backpacker Grace Millane who was killed in New Zealand on eve of her 22nd birthday, has broken her silence over her daughter’s murder.

Speaking to The Extraordinary Ordinary podcast, Gillian said Grace was an amazing young girl and her best friend.

“From a very early age, she wanted to travel and New Zealand was one of the places she wrote about,” she said.

Grace, a graduate in marketing and advertising, was last seen alive in central Auckland on December 1, 2018.

She was on a two-week stay in New Zealand after spending six weeks in South America.

Grace Millane, 22, was killed by a Tinder date who claimed he'd consensually choked her. Photo / Supplied

Her body was found eight days later in West Auckland’s Waitākere Ranges, near Scenic Drive.

Jesse Shane Kempson, who was 26 at the time, was convicted of the murder and was sentenced in 2020 to life in prison with a minimum non-parole period of 17 years.

Kempson, her Tinder date, strangled Millane to death in his central city hotel apartment, claiming it was consensual. Kempson used the defence the pair were engaged in “rough sex”.

Gillian said the trial was horrendous, having to just sit in a courtroom and listen “while they’re annihilating your daughter”.

She said the family has never mentioned Kempson’s name.

“I don’t think about him, I don’t care what happens to him.

Grace Millane with her mother Gillian.

“He came into our life and destroyed our family. I don’t care about his name, I don’t care about him,” she said.

Just a week before Grace was killed, Gillian underwent surgery for a breast cancer diagnosis.

In a double blow for the family, Grace’s father David Millane was diagnosed with cancer after spending almost three weeks in Auckland in December 2019 while attending the trial for his daughter’s killer.

“He was taken unwell while we were at the trial but we just put it down to stress and we thought he had an ulcer,” Gillian said.

Unfortunately, David was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma.

Grace Millane's parents Dave and Gillian speak to the media at the Auckland High Court after the jury delivered a murder verdict. Photo \ Jason Oxenham

“That was another disastrous Christmas and New Year,” said Gillian.

After the cancer spread to his brain, David died in November 2020.

“I was in such a dark, lonely place and I pushed everybody away... Trying to find your path on this road of grief is a very difficult thing to do.

“You get to a point when you realise that you’re the only one that can get you out of there,” Gillian said.

Through numerous amounts of grief counselling and victim support, Gillian says she found a chink of light, channelling her grief into Grace’s memory.

She now is heavily involved in advocating for justice, “raising awareness about the importance of respecting and protecting the rights and safety of individuals”.

Gillian works closely with White Ribbon, which aims to flip the script of “boys will be boys”.

“I can say that my toes are always in the darkness and sometimes my feet and waist but my head is probably more in the sun now,” she said.

In October 2020, Kempson was also convicted on eight charges relating to offending against his former partner including sexual violation by unlawful sexual connection, threatening to kill, assault with a weapon and male assaults female.

In November 2020, he was convicted on one charge of sexually violating another woman, a British tourist like Millane, in an unrelated incident.

Jesse Shane Kempson makes his first appearance at the Auckland District Court for the murder of Grace Millane. Photo / Michael Craig

“You have no reason to convict me,” Kempson yelled at trial judge Justice Geoffrey Venning from the dock at the conclusion of his third trial.

“I can’t wait for the Court of Appeal to overturn you, mate. You’re full of s***.”

For both sets of the offending, he received total sentence of 11 years’ imprisonment. This was ordered to be served concurrently with the life sentence he received for murdering Millane, whose body was found in a shallow grave in the Waitākere bush.

The now 31-year-old Kempson appealed both his convictions and his sentences for the offending against the two other women and a Court of Appeal hearing was held last year.

Kempson caught on CCTV buying a spade to bury Grace Millane's body.

In March this year, the judgment, with reasons by Justice David Gendall, was released.

He said after reviewing all of the submissions made by Kempson’s legal team and the Crown, the appeal was rejected.

“We find that neither of the individual sentences imposed contained any error, nor is the total cumulative sentence of 11 years’ imprisonment manifestly excessive,” Justice Gendall ruled.

“Both appeals against sentence are also dismissed.”