Victor Alexeyev, 36, was born in Soviet Russia in 1989. In 2025 he set out on a journey to find his birth parents.
Victor Alexeyev, 36, was born in Soviet Russia in 1989. In 2025 he set out on a journey to find his birth parents.
Victor Alexeyev, adopted from Russia, sought his birth mother after his son’s birth.
With help from Alex Gilbert’s I’m Adopted network, he discovered his mother, Ludmila, died in 2000.
Despite unanswered questions about his father, Alexeyev found closure and plans to visit his mother’s grave.
Victor Alexeyev has always known he was adopted – but unlike many in his situation, he’d never been overly curious about who his birth parents were, until now.
When his son was born, Alexeyev said he discovered a newfound need to learn more about his roots.
“I wanted to connect particularly with my birth mother because I wanted to let her know my life turned out really well,“ he said.
Victor Alexeyev, 36, from Christchurch was born in Russia in 1989 and this year embarked on a journey to find his birth parents. Photo / Alex Gilbert
Alexeyev was born in Soviet Russia in 1989 and spent the first four years of his life in an orphanage in the small town of Velikiye Luki, in the Pskov Oblast region.
Cold War tension was still affecting civilians across Russia at the time, and Velikiye Luki was no exception, Alexeyev said.
That orphanage would later become the starting point in the 36-year-old’s search for his birth parents.
When he was just over 4 years old, Alexeyev was adopted by a family from Auckland.
He grew up in Mt Albert before his family moved to Cambridge. With no memories from his time in Russia, he has always felt like a “true Kiwi”.
Now a science teacher and photographer, Alexeyev lives in Christchurch with his wife, Anna, and their 2-year-old son, Nikolai.
Alexeyev said a big motivator for finding his birth mum was to have the chance to tell her she’d “done the right thing”.
“I wouldn’t want her to have any guilt and feel happy that she’d made the right decision putting me in an orphanage,” he said.
“I started with nothing and I went through adoption and I have ended up having everything I could have possibly needed.”
Victor Alexeyev of Christchurch was born in Russia in 1989 and embarked on a journey to find his birth parents this year. Photo / Alex Gilbert
On a visit to his hometown in 2016, Alexeyev had made little headway in finding his birth mother. So this year he approached Alex Gilbert.
Gilbert, a fellow adoptee, runs a New Zealand and worldwide support network for adopted children and adults, called I’m Adopted, which became a registered charity in 2020 . He also produces an independent project called An Adoption Story, which follows the journeys of New Zealand adoptees finding their birth families.
Alex Gilbert created the I'm Adopted community for adoptees from New Zealand and around the world to connect. Photo / Supplied
“I wanted to create it because I wanted honestly for other adoptees to connect, it’s about having that support network, which I didn’t have when I was trying to search for my parents,” Gilbert said.
So, when Alexeyev told Gilbert his story, he knew he wanted to help.
“I’ve been on that boat before and I just didn’t have any answers for so many years until I did the research myself,” he said.
Gilbert contacted a translator based in Valikiye Luki, who had helped Alexeyev when he’d visited in 2016. He knew Alexeyev’s mother’s name was Ludmila, and after months of work, he managed to confirm who she was.
It was discovered that his birth mother, Ludmila, had died in 2000. Gilbert located exactly where she was buried. She died in a “high-needs facility”, aged just 39 years.
“There’s still a lot of mystery around my mother’s medical history because she died quite young,” Alexeyev said.
He found himself questioning what physical or mental illness his mother might have had. Unfortunately at the time, the facility’s records were all on paper. He said there’s very little information on her condition other than the records that she died in the facility.
“I kind of was surprised – if she was living with these high needs, physical or mental needs, then it’s all the more amazing with how I turned out,” he said.
According to Gilbert, no words on his birth father ever came to light. In fact, the name on his adoption paperwork was likely fake.
“I had reinstated my father’s surname, only to find out it was probably fabricated,” Alexeyev said.
Despite unanswered questions, Alexeyev gained closure in finding out who his mother was and plans to bring his family to her grave, and to his hometown.
Gilbert met his Russian birth parents in 2013. During the process, he said he also discovered ties to Ukraine and Kazakhstan.
“I’m just about wanting people to learn about where they come from. It’s a choice that they want to learn, of course, but having that support network there I think is so important.”
Gilbert said his series isn’t just for fellow adoptees to feel seen, it’s also for aspiring parents to consider adoption and the widespread benefits it can have.
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