Foreign lump gripped my heart

By KATHERINE HOBY

Several years ago a doctor found a lump in my right breast during a routine examination.

I was told I needed further checks to determine what sort of lump it might be.

I agonised over what it might mean. I called my mother, who went suddenly cold and silent on the end of the phone when I said the words "breast lump" to her.

During the night I couldn't stop thinking about this lump inside me, and several times placed my fingers on the lower curve of my breast. It was almost as if I thought it was not there, or that it might have somehow disappeared.

But every time I checked, there it was, a small, hard, marble-sized growth in my breast. I was terrified.

I knew the chances of it being cancerous were slim. I was only 24 and there was no family history of breast cancer. I didn't have any other risk factors I knew of.

But I started thinking about whether I was living my life the way I wanted to, and what I might do if the diagnosis was "malignant".

It seems particularly hard to have this growth in a breast, in a symbol of femininity and womanliness. And I considered how it might affect my life if I needed a mastectomy, my whole breast removed. It's amazing what you think of at these times.

After a night of little sleep, I took a day off work to see a specialist.

The breast specialist carried out a fine needle biopsy (aspiration), an unpleasant procedure that involves inserting a fine needle into the breast to get a sample of what the lump is made of. It was painful. I cried, partly through nerves and fear, partly from discomfort.

The specialist talked through the possibilities with me, reassuring me that there was every chance the lump was a cyst or fibroadenoma.

And the relief I felt when I found out it was the latter was enormous.

Since the lump was not malignant, I had a choice: I could leave it or have it removed.

I knew right away that I wanted it removed. It was an invader and I wanted it gone. Each time I thought of this lump inside me, I felt ill.

The operation involved only a day-stay in hospital, though I took several days off work afterwards. I was very tender and in some pain for four days. I had a small scar from the lumpectomy, which has now disappeared.

I have been told that other fibroadenomas might develop in future, but I will deal with them if and when the time comes.

If you are in a high-risk group, get a mammogram. And women of all ages should become familiar with what their breasts look and feel like. That way, it will be easier to detect and deal with changes early.

I was lucky - one of the many women who find the lumps in their breasts are non-cancerous.

Self-examination may be a disputed method of detecting breast lumps but I feel a lot better knowing mine was discovered, and that I had the choice to act.

Further reading
nzherald.co.nz/health