Harry Averill has written a book about his descent into anorexia and how he came out the other side healthy and happy. Photo / Paul Taylor
Anorexia — the word instantly conjures up images of frighteningly thin young women.
When I Googled the name of the eating disorder, there were plenty of hits about symptoms, signs and what it does to the female body.
My first search found nothing about the effects the disorder has ona male.
Perhaps that’s one of the reasons 13-year-old Harry Averill became so gravely ill before he was diagnosed with the eating disorder.
No one thought for a minute that the healthy teenager starting boarding at Napier Boys’ High School would end up in Hawke’s Bay Hospital and spend months in a Wellington psych ward.
His book, aptly named Hungry to be Happy: How I Lost and Found my Mind tells of his journey — the highs, the utter despair, the fight back at the bully that was anorexia and the incredible support he had from family, friends, teachers, and medical staff.
Harry is the middle child of three brothers. He had a happy childhood in the midst of a loving family. He enjoyed rugby, cricket and tennis.
When Harry started high school - which, as he points out in his book, is a big deal no matter who you are, and starting at a boarding school is an even bigger deal - it was the most significant change in his life.
He made the school running team and, without giving too much of the story away, it wasn’t long before the happy-go-lucky teen found himself hungry to be happy.
He felt as if he had crossed a line from being a kid, and the time had come to grow up and plan for his future. For Harry, success was the key to happiness.
So, when he started running, he decided that the faster he ran, the more successful he would be, and therefore the happier he would be.
At first, he simply started skipping dessert because then, in his mind, he wouldn’t have to do so much exercise the next day.
It became a vicious circle - if he ate, he had to exercise, to relieve the guilt and make him feel happy.
By September, his “thoughts were being hammered every minute by pressure to exercise”, and if he didn’t he was consumed by guilt.
By then, Harry was in a dangerous place.
The reality of his situation hit him “like a ton of bricks” the day his mother put a plate of toast in front of him and he knew that if he couldn’t spend the rest of the day exercising, he couldn’t eat a thing on the plate.
“Upon realising that, all I felt was fear,” Harry says in his book.
His life was in the balance. His weight had plummeted and he felt as if he was losing his mind.
Harry was admitted to hospital not long after, and from there spent months in a psych ward.
It was terrifying for him.
“I saw things that no 14-year-old should. However, because it was so scary, my only goal was to get out of there. The good thing was that there was a team of people dedicated to helping me get better every moment of the day.”
Harry says he is excited about the release of his book “which has been a long time coming”.
“The main reason I wrote it was for awareness. A big part of the reason I got so sick before being diagnosed was that no one thought of anorexia for a guy,” Harry said.
“Maybe if I had a book like this when I got sick I might have realised what was happening to me and been able to turn it around.
“It has been hard to put myself out there, but in saying that, I wanted to do it. I decided that I might as well share these lessons.
“I wrote it for myself, my teachers, my family and anyone who is unfortunate enough to deal with anorexia”.
When I spoke with Harry, it was 10 years to the day that he was dropped off at Napier Boys’ High. That was in 2013 - he never thought for a moment that the next three years of his life would be so “impactive” and that he would reach such “terrible lows”.
After high school, Harry went to Otago University, where he completed a degree in commerce and psychology. This year, he will be training to become a teacher.
“It feels as if I have come full circle. Writing this book is closure for me. My relationship with food is normal; I still exercise, but in a normal way.”
Hungry to be Happy includes the added perspective of people like Harry’s mum Beth.
Her words reached me on an entirely different level as a mother and grandmother. Anorexia didn’t just have Harry in its grip, it held the entire extended family.
I couldn’t put this book down. Mental illness is something that needs to be talked about at every opportunity, and while Harry found himself in utter despair, he found the courage, with support from family and medical professionals, to fight back. That’s the message he wants to get across in Hungry to be Happy.
The book was released yesterday (February 3) and is available at Wardini Books in Havelock North and Napier, or from harryaverill.com and Amazon Books, which also stocks it in an e-book format.