Te Radar: Vigilantes are a strange mob

I am sure that if I had children and some degenerate sexually abused them, I would be the first to demand we nail the perpetrator to a plank and inject battery acid into their urethras.

However, it strikes me as odd that in a country with a predilection for slaughtering our women, our elderly and our children, it seems to be only those who engage in inappropriate sexual relations with minors that are so strongly vilified.

Personally I wonder where the equality of vigilantism is?

Surely if we are to return to the glorious freedom of the days when torch-toting mobs ran the undesirables out of town, then at the very least we could extend the range of those upon whom we vent our wrathful civic vengeance.

Can we not also expel from our hamlets the rapists, murderers, wife-beaters, swindlers and con artists whose antics can devastate generations?

In light of Blackball's blackballing of a convicted paedophile, it's natural that the theme of the week seems to be bullying. Just ask any of those subdued by the powers that be in Uzbekistan. Oh, that's right, we can't. They're dead.

The news that hundreds of people were massacred by the Uzbekistani Government makes the thought of simply disciplining the unruly by putting a tennis ball in their mouths seem a little tame.

Thoughtfully though, the Uzbek President, Islam Karimov, has substantially streamlined the normally cumbersome institution of democracy by banning all opposition parties. I wouldn't be surprised if some here weren't wishing they could do the same thing.

While he is also accused of boiling dissidents alive in oil (possibly the same oil that makes him such a friend of America), it seems that our politicians willingly leap into the frying pan themselves.

While the alleged actions of David Benson-Pope may have constituted dehumanising and degrading behaviour, I would suggest that so too is bumping the needy from hospital waiting lists.

Much to my disappointment I was never caned at school. It would have been interesting to see how painful and degrading it actually was.

The most absurd punishment I recall facing was being forced by a wiry middle-distance-running mathematics teacher to have to sit outside the maths class and do nothing.

Quite what this achieved, other than giving me an inherent distrust of middle-distance runners and the inability to perform basic trigonometry equations, I do not know.

The question always remains, though: when the mob has run its course and inadvertently lynched the wrong person, will those involved shamefacedly try to plead innocence, or simply state that they were only following the orders of the guy who lives up the street?

Still, as much fun as bullying vigilantism is, with its positive side- effects such as improved community spirit, communal exercise and picturesque house fires, the problem with mob rule is that the mob will always descend to the lowest common denominator. Just look at Parliament.