Sideswipe

Huge saving on these peaches at Foodtown, Lynnmall.

Notice outside the Mokoia Rd Dental Centre in Birkenhead: "We cater well for cowards" ... which is good to know.

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A post on the Trade Me community boards has a warning for nose-pickers on the move (you know who you are): "I was happily driving down the road picking my nose the other day, when I saw a police car. I quickly checked the speedo, as you do, to see that all was within legal limits, and carried on assured that I was not a law-breaker. To my surprise, in the rear-vision mirror I see a re-run of Starsky and Hutch as the police car with lights flashing tries to run me off the road. After coming to a halt, the officer asks me for my licence and asks why I was trying to conceal my identity by covering my face when he approached. I explained with embarrassment that I was merely picking a big bogey out of my nose. He said that he should ticket me for not being in full control of the vehicle while driving, but let me off with a warning and drove off."

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Neville C. Guy is relieved to read about a re-branding of Lion Red away from the red-blooded image. He writes: "I consider myself a mature, normally very sober Auckland businessman whose beer of choice for many years has been Lion Red. When in company recently I've had to resort to quietly pouring the beer from the can into a glass, or ensuring that my hand covers the label if I have a bottle. I can't put the cardboard packaging out with the paper recycling in case a neighbour sees it, and have tried burning it or slipping it into the neighbour's recycling late a night. I always make sure the 12-pack is my first purchase at the supermarket so I can bury it under other stuff. So bring on the new image."

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During the 1980s, senior British Government officials spent quite a bit of time debating how best to protect the Loch Ness Monster from poachers, according to recently released memos. "Unfortunately, Nessie is not a salmon and would not appear to qualify as a freshwater fish under the Salmon and Fisheries Protection (Scotland) Act 1951," wrote an official with the Department of Agriculture and Fisheries. Officials ultimately determined that Nessie is protected under the 1981 Wildlife and Countryside Act and would not require special legislation. (Source: Reason.com)