Sideswipe

Parochial deafness: Sideswipe accused the NBC clip which aired on TV One in its round-up of New Year's Eve celebrations of saying Sydney was "the first city to see in the new year", saying this was not only a ludicrous assertion, it was wrong. The reporter actually said Sydney was the "first major city to see in the New Year". Which is fair enough, particularly when you consider the best pictures our "world-class city" could offer would be a) bodies packed into the sweltering Aotea Centre for the sixth Annual First Night celebration for fear of collapsing Aotea Square into the carpark below, or b) the throngs lining Queen St alongside those scruffy death-row liquidambar trees watching the Sky Tower spurt out a few fireworks. Hardly comparable to the spectacular display on the Sydney Harbour Bridge, eh?

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A reader from St Marys Bay writes: "We were watching some footage on Sky News from the heyday of pyjama cricket. Dennis Lillee, Max Walker, the Chappell brothers, and even Richie Benaud in an off-white jacket swamped by a mauve number with massive collar. Our 15-year-old pipes up, "Isn't it neat how they all wore those retro shirts?" Hullo ...

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Ian Timms from Takapuna writes: "I was amused by your recent puns for all the whanau. However, there will probably be those who think you were taking things a bit whanau."

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Apparently some copies of the interactive talking book Potty Time With Elmo were clandestinely programmed to say, "Who wants to die?" According to a local news report, the manufacturer has received more than one complaint about this. The correct statement is, "Who wants to try to go potty?"

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Suing your local council, UK-style: A man tried to sue a local authority after he wet himself because the bus station toilet was closed. He was claiming the cost of a new pair of trousers. A refuse worker took legal action against his council, claiming he was "startled" by a dead badger which fell out of a rubbish bag. A motorist filed a claim after failing to see a roundabout in broad daylight, even though there was a tree right in the middle of it. And one high-minded soul tried to take legal action against several local authorities and the Archbishop of Canterbury "on behalf of all the homeless people in Britain". (Source: BBC Online)

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Japanese figure-skater Mao Asada is not allowed to compete in this year's Winter Olympics because she was born 87 days too late. Mao is the only female to have managed two triple axels in a single performance. She is regarded as the greatest jumper in the sport's history but the International Skating Union rules say she had to have turned 15 by July 1 last year to be eligible: her birthday was not until September.